Starting to think about it again.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by voices_inmy_head, Sep 13, 2009.

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  1. voices_inmy_head

    voices_inmy_head Well-Known Member

    My thoughts towards suicide are not constant, I go through periods of days when I don't think about it at all. Lately though I feel so, have no idea which word fits, sad, useless, miserable, lonely, no word fits how I feel.

    Everyone has seemed to have gone, not literally, I still talk to them occasionally but they don't seem to be here. Everyone has gone and gotten a new life suddenly, a life which has little or no room for me. My family has separated into separate lives, none of which have room for me. And my one real friend is impossible to get through too. She’s still there of course but the unanswered phone and promises to call me back which never happen.

    I am so low right now I just wish it would all end. I have nothing it feels like.

    I used to drink heavily and while I still on occasion slip up and drink a large amount my poor health has cut down on my drinking a lot. I miss it though, in a way drinking kept my thoughts jumbled so I couldn’t clearly think like this.

    I wish I could just end it all, I sometimes sit here sobbing begging myself to finish it.
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    I just wanted you to know that you're not alone. Here if you want to talk.
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You sound very lonely and need someone to just talk with spend some time with you. I am glad you are here lots of people here that can relate. I always put TV on to distract those unwanted thoughts. try to concentrate on different things distract myself. Just took bath now spending time here anything to keep my mind occupied Please take care and if your voices don't settle down with meds call your doctor okay meds may need adjusting take care
  4. voices_inmy_head

    voices_inmy_head Well-Known Member

    I'm not on any meds, the poor health I mentioned was my physical health which is still undiagnosed after years...

    But your right I need a distraction, I spent ages yesterday just making my feet soft which helped distract me.

    Thank you violet, I wish I had someone here to talk to, and just keep me going.

    And thank you wildcherry too.
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