I’m new to this group. I just need to reach out because I’m on a downwards spiral and I can’t live like this anymore. I’ve been feeling low for a while, probably a few years but it has become much worse recently. I’m a stay at home mum to 5 young children, with the youngest 2 years old. My marriage is not functional and loveless and, even though I love my children and know that I would never want to leave them, I feel that I have nothing to live for. I have no joy in everyday life and I just exist. I used to have a professional job but stopped 12 years ago to look after our children, under pressure from my husband. I don’t feel like myself at all anymore and am a shell of who I used to be. I feel taken for granted and not free to make my own decisions and, ultimately, totally worthless. I used to have confidence in my own abilities but now I have no self confidence. I want to go back to work but feel trapped and incapable and have no support to help get myself out of this. As a result I am moody and snappy all the time and am not the person I want to be or the mum that the children deserve.
This was bearable and I just carried on until we moved house, just a month ago. I now have no friends and no one to talk to except my husband, and we do not get along. Lockdown restrictions make it really difficult to meet people and make connections.
I don’t want to die but really don’t want to be alive. If anyone has similar experiences and can give me some advice please reach out.
This was bearable and I just carried on until we moved house, just a month ago. I now have no friends and no one to talk to except my husband, and we do not get along. Lockdown restrictions make it really difficult to meet people and make connections.
I don’t want to die but really don’t want to be alive. If anyone has similar experiences and can give me some advice please reach out.