stepped into it very deeply..; now what?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by jimk, May 9, 2010.

  1. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    ever while you were doing something that you knew you should stop rite now and just shut the hell up but go ahead and do it anyway?? well ohter night on a website similar to this i under the effects of too much champagne just could not help myself and hurt someone dear with my actions, words adn big mouth..

    well to make it worse the next day i continued and said more words which should have gone unsaid and turned it into a major fight which was in front of everyone to be able to read.. i confronted a former dear friend about why was she not posting about her life and how she was doing anymore. her current friends jumped on me with both feet then in print in front of everyone.

    finally a rational person's post said why don't you take this to personal messages instead of out in front of everyone? well we did adn statements and thoughts got even nastier.. long adn short i was told the reason she was not posting about herself was because she was having a really bad time now.. then i got a message from this former friend sayhing i had hurt her badly adn embarrassed the heck out of her.. i sent her a message apologizing and sayinjg i would not ever do that again and i was very sorry..

    now i am the bad guy on this website.. very much so.. why oh why couldn't i just shut up adn stop running my hurtful mouth adn fingers off????

    well it is a new day and i have to go on but i am not sure how.. hopefully my son john will wake up sooon adn i will have some company. Jim
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I know what it's like to say something and then later regret it. :hug: I don't have much advice other than to take the time to prove yourself trustworthy on this other website. And it does take time; it can be a slow process. But it's worth it.
  3. carekitty

    carekitty Guest

    I've seen that happen on sites, and have said things I really wish I hadn't.

    You've apologized to your friend, and maybe you can make an apology on the site? After that, just try and make amends and hopefully over time trust will be restored.

    We all make mistakes, all we can do is try not to repeat them. :hug:
  4. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    thank you carekitty and wildcherry.. today i got over myself and started the daily cafe ttopic which is added to by others saying briefly what is on there mind adn on their schedules atm.. was worrried that noone else was going to post but they did as usual.. so am over my total reluictance to post on the site.. i just hurt unintentionally my old friend and she made it real clear to me in a final message.. you and i are over finito.. we sort of were already but that made it real clear..

    like you said you can never change the past ... .. only try nto do rite in the present and the future.. and try to find the will and strength to keep going and move on.. at a point not too long ago i had been on the staff running all kinds of programs helping others. the support chats. the helping hands, the abuse and depression forum.. well i started dissociating and while an alter was pres\ent i did and said some things that over time got my staff priviieges and duties taken away from me..

    that still hurts but just have to live with it.. and also hope i do not go tot\ally over the edge sometime and be banned.. having been on that website for over 6 yrs now that would not be good at all.. i will try to spend some more time here on suicide forum getting to know some people and supporting others as i can.l.. maybe here more than i planned on. LOL

    take care, Jim
  5. Georgy

    Georgy Account Closed

    I've done it many times myself. Try not to beat yourself up about it. And remember, words always speak louder than words. You still have time to show your true character, that you're sorry this ever happened....