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still her !

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by stevew10, Jul 10, 2009.

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  1. stevew10

    stevew10 Member

    Well, after a tough time lately i finally plucked up the courage to end it, i went to a massive park near where my ex fiancee lived at around midnight, drove right over into the middle of it and hid my car under some trees, put my pipe in place and was ready to go, then a poxy guy walks out with a dog, can you beleive it ?? a dog walker at midnight, so i put everything away and decided to wait a bit...

    The long and short of it is, the police came flying from every direction and i was found with my bit of pipe and cuts to my wrists (although they were pretty crap and defo not life threatening)

    I had actually changed my mind when the police came, but it was too late and i was "sectioned" and have spent the last little while in a poxy hospital, so i give this advice, dont get caught !!!

    I never actually made it to damaging myself, apart from a few scratches on my wrist but the time in hospital was fookin horrible, having to talk about my problems when i really didnt want to and being held and on suicide watch, woken up constantly, it was a horrible experience.
  2. Leiaha

    Leiaha Well-Known Member

    I could have been that person, I often walk my dog at 2am ish. Yeah, being sectioned is crap! The threat of being sectioned is definitely part of what stops me being too honest about how I feel right now!
  3. stevew10

    stevew10 Member

    Firstly, the title of the thread should be "still here" it sounds like a transvestite thread or something....lol i am "still her" oops, that typo was a cracker.. !!

    Secondly, yes your right, all this has done is make me scared shitless to share any feelings with anyone that actually knows me, i feel i am walking on eggshells and if i am in that position again will have to face it alone, which will make me more likely to be successful, the "system" sucks and really doesnt help those in "trouble"
  4. downunder

    downunder Well-Known Member

    I talk to a shrink and tell her about previous attempts, even one that you tried. She says she won';t section me, because Hospital wouldn't help.

    I found once I was worried about talking about it for the same reason you are and then started smell car fumes everywhere I went and once I talked about it they went away.

    If you had of started your attempt and been caught in the middle of it you could have been left with permanent brain damage, and it is not an easy way to go.
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