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still here :-(

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by Heavenly Star, Sep 27, 2009.

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  1. Heavenly Star

    Heavenly Star Well-Known Member

    i've taken so many overdoses yet i am still here existing in this miserable, pointless life.

    on wednesday evening i took an overdose, then again on thursday i took another one. on friday i told my support worker what i had done and she called an ambulance but i refused to go to hospital so they then called the police. they said that if i went to hospital i could speak to a duty psychiatrist who could maybe try and help me. stupid me fell for this so i ended up agreeing to go to hospital. spent a few hours there whilst i was treated then discharged home without seeing or talking to anybody.

    as soon as i got home from the hospital i took even more tablets. i just want to die. i had another visit from my support worker yesterday and she said i looked really awful and asked me if i had taken some more tablets. i told her the truth because i hate lying to people, i just can't do it. so again she called an ambulance, who then called the police. whilst this was going on i was taking more and more tablets. eventually i passed out and woke up in hospital. this time i had a brief chat with the duty psychiatrist who gave me a tablet to calm me down then sent me home with the number of a crisis team. so i went home, rang the crisis team and told them that i was feeling really distressed and desperate and felt like overdosing again. i was told there was no point in doing it again and to get some sleep.

    after that great bit of advice (NOT) i took yet another overdose. I just don't know what to do anymore. I am at rock bottom and desperate to die. no one will do anything to help me. they just cast me aside as some sort of nuisance. i'm just a worthless piece of shit.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You are not a worthless nothing This dam psychiatrist who keeps sending you home is the worthless nothing he is playing god with your life. You need to call crisis right now and tell them you are going to kill yourself and you need help.
    You call the ambulance and let them know what you did and this time tell the dam psychiatrist you need to stay in hospital until they get you stable at least
    Can you not go to a different hospital one that cares. Go outside your district and get help from them.
    CALL crisis now THROW away your pills and go to emergency by ambulance and refuse to leave until they get you help you need. Again you are important and you deserve to be helped you deserve to be well and safe It is the law that they keep you safe from yourself so call now and start getting help you need
    Please stop harming your organs by taking all these pills you will only suffer terribly your liver damage organ damage will be terrible please get help now
    CAll crisis again and this time refuse to leave. tell them if they send yu home you will not survive. Get a family member to take you to a differnet hospital where you will get care you need. Please don't stop trying just because of one dam doctor please try again.
  3. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    Please come here and post or read instead of taking the pills. Please keep trying this. You are fighting for yourself to come through this.
  4. happiness

    happiness Member

    Hello Heavenly Star,

    I am sad to hear about what you are going through. Maybe you are still here for a reason. As cliche as that sounds, many survivors have gone on to find happiness and success in life. Even several survivors on here have told stories about how life gets better. Please continue to post on here if you are feeling down so the community can help. Please don't feel like you are alone - you can always come on here and just talk about whats on your mind.
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