i've taken so many overdoses yet i am still here existing in this miserable, pointless life. on wednesday evening i took an overdose, then again on thursday i took another one. on friday i told my support worker what i had done and she called an ambulance but i refused to go to hospital so they then called the police. they said that if i went to hospital i could speak to a duty psychiatrist who could maybe try and help me. stupid me fell for this so i ended up agreeing to go to hospital. spent a few hours there whilst i was treated then discharged home without seeing or talking to anybody. as soon as i got home from the hospital i took even more tablets. i just want to die. i had another visit from my support worker yesterday and she said i looked really awful and asked me if i had taken some more tablets. i told her the truth because i hate lying to people, i just can't do it. so again she called an ambulance, who then called the police. whilst this was going on i was taking more and more tablets. eventually i passed out and woke up in hospital. this time i had a brief chat with the duty psychiatrist who gave me a tablet to calm me down then sent me home with the number of a crisis team. so i went home, rang the crisis team and told them that i was feeling really distressed and desperate and felt like overdosing again. i was told there was no point in doing it again and to get some sleep. after that great bit of advice (NOT) i took yet another overdose. I just don't know what to do anymore. I am at rock bottom and desperate to die. no one will do anything to help me. they just cast me aside as some sort of nuisance. i'm just a worthless piece of shit.