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Still In Love?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by FreeHaven, Nov 14, 2008.

  1. FreeHaven

    FreeHaven New Member

    Around Feburary last year I met a lovely woman who, although 14 years my senior satisfied me in every way. She made me feel content and happy, loved for the first time in my life and she told me I made her feel that way too...I could see I did.

    Her being 14 years my senior wasn't the real problem though, the real problem was that she was engaged. That scared me at first but she told me she wasn't happy with him and she left him to be with me.

    The days and weeks and months passed and we seemed really good together, this one was working! One day she went home to collect some stuff to move into mine and she didn't come back. I tried her phone, her email, her myspace and there was no sign of life when finally I found a new Myspace page created by her...she was getting married TO HIM!

    This sent me into a spiral of self-loathing, despair and doubt. Did she really love me? Was it all a lie? What the hell did I do wrong?!

    Finally at christmas last year I got over her, I thought I had moved on and 3 months ago I got a new girlfriend who is so great but I find it hard to trust her and to be honest loving her so much depresses me, it makes me think of how much I loved my ex and it floods back all these terrible memories...what is wrong with me? Am I still in love with my ex? Is my current relationship saveable?

    Advice desperatley needed, hope someone can help.
  2. $MyName

    $MyName Well-Known Member

    I'm not expert, but I don't think the problem is not being over her as such, and I don't think that your relationship that you're currently in isn't "saveable".

    You've clearly been hurt badly, and are naturally struggling to really genuinely trust someone else the way you did, which is fair enough, but you're going to need to try and work on that.

    I can understand the thoughts/memories coming up and making you feel depressed, and that's something that'll you'll have to overcome, unfortunately I have no idea how to help you with any of this... But I wouldn't assume your current relationship isn't saveable, or that you don't have genuine feelings for her.