Hi, So i cut myself really bad tonight. never cut myself that bad but i just kept going. I knew i had cut bad , so i thought i had better go to hospital and get stitches and speak to the mental health team. I am very suicidal and knew i would cut myself again soon. I went up and after waiting for 1.5 hours in a busy a&E department, Scared stiff that someone was going to hurt me and also wanting to cut my wrists . They saw me. Asked what i wanted i said i need to be in hospital as i am going to go home and kill myself. They said there is no beds just now and to use the phone lines. I said i dont like them as i like to see someone face to face when i am talking to them. Plus i did not care enough to use it as i just want to die. They refused me and send me packing after having 15 stiches in my arm. Now i am home i just self harmed again , prob need more stiches but to scared ot go back as they wont do anything to help i am lost i just want to cut my wrists help no one to turn too now not even the hospital will help me.