I usually don't dream specifically anymore, but last night i did and it was kinda nice to dream again, but it was odd.
Somehow i was in this house like place, and there were loads of us, like a dozen maybe, all patients. (it's very fuzzy now) Anyhow, I didn't belong, I dont know if anyone did, but I was there, and somehow I just accepted it.(I get this feeling alot, where I just accept it because "more" is .. perhaps not something I should have?)
Anyhow, there were the standard supervisors and they just blended in, but there was this girl. And she was staring me down, and i cant remember how but she was concerning me somehow. I think she did a few more, odd things. Then the supervisors left and replacments came in. This is where it gets fuzzy again, i think i went to another room, and then she kinda came at me,(attacking, but sort of that crazy calm attack). I think she had sissors or something but I stopped her, but in the end, I was the one who was declared nuts and the new shift thought i was the odd ball.
Now ok, fine i can guess parts of me are concerned about parts of me, but you know what. I hate that feeling. Being in containment and defined and misunderstood. It's such an irregular feeling for who I am, considering I dont believe anyone should or can have that sort of "control" or "opinion" over me, but in this dream, it was all there. Doesnt bother me really. Just a dream but, hell, i had a dream Ill take it, i just hope next time I remember me, instead of being that "me" in the dream.
Wait, maybe that "me" in the dream is how I feel in socitey? Or how I feel in life outside of my mind? Donno, maybe the girl was another part of me angry at myself for bringing her(that aspect) of me into that state and allowing it to get to that point, but the part of me that is in control is so unsure of who I am that it submitts to an authority for reasons of safety and security? Even when that level of safety and security is compromising to who I am. And when I express who I am, I am misunderstood even further?
Idk.. could be alot of things.
I had a dream That's so cool.:tongue:
Somehow i was in this house like place, and there were loads of us, like a dozen maybe, all patients. (it's very fuzzy now) Anyhow, I didn't belong, I dont know if anyone did, but I was there, and somehow I just accepted it.(I get this feeling alot, where I just accept it because "more" is .. perhaps not something I should have?)
Anyhow, there were the standard supervisors and they just blended in, but there was this girl. And she was staring me down, and i cant remember how but she was concerning me somehow. I think she did a few more, odd things. Then the supervisors left and replacments came in. This is where it gets fuzzy again, i think i went to another room, and then she kinda came at me,(attacking, but sort of that crazy calm attack). I think she had sissors or something but I stopped her, but in the end, I was the one who was declared nuts and the new shift thought i was the odd ball.
Now ok, fine i can guess parts of me are concerned about parts of me, but you know what. I hate that feeling. Being in containment and defined and misunderstood. It's such an irregular feeling for who I am, considering I dont believe anyone should or can have that sort of "control" or "opinion" over me, but in this dream, it was all there. Doesnt bother me really. Just a dream but, hell, i had a dream Ill take it, i just hope next time I remember me, instead of being that "me" in the dream.
Wait, maybe that "me" in the dream is how I feel in socitey? Or how I feel in life outside of my mind? Donno, maybe the girl was another part of me angry at myself for bringing her(that aspect) of me into that state and allowing it to get to that point, but the part of me that is in control is so unsure of who I am that it submitts to an authority for reasons of safety and security? Even when that level of safety and security is compromising to who I am. And when I express who I am, I am misunderstood even further?
Idk.. could be alot of things.
I had a dream That's so cool.:tongue: