~stream of conciousness~ (could be triggering)

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by tintin, Mar 31, 2008.

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  1. tintin

    tintin Guest

    i cant go on like this i cnt
    my hed is fucked up my arms r fucked up my life is fucked up
    u think it is funni wt u do i dnt
    i have the perfect plan and today is my date
    i HAVE to do it i cnt fyt
    i cnt b raped everynyt tht pretend everything is ok
    i feel so dirty nd lost nd ashamed y did you pik me im an ugly fuckin bitch u cudda piked any1 y me
    13yrs ago today it started i was fuckin 4 wen u cme in in ur clown outfit nd touched me up
    thn u laffed wen i finally figured ot it waa rong it wa t l8 yu had gne all the way
    YOU TOOK EVERYTHING!!! my virginity my innocence..my dad
    e doesnt gv a fuck about me
    i HAVE TO GO
    i cnt cope
    is it my falt you do what you do
    i want my mum...I NEED MY MUM..i wanna be with my mum
    so confused cant sleep failin college but no1 cares
    my dad doesnt care e jus lets yu carry on
    wt am i supposed to do........
    i have 22 hours 34mins to get it over with
    if i dnt do it in this tym i will fail myself
    if i do i faiil ppl who tried to help me
    am i past help?
    cn eny1 stop im big fuckin FOODLE
    y adam y invent foodle
    y meee
    I DONT UNDASTAND..why me
    today is the day i go i have to i cant go on
    my head is spinnin my arms r bleedin and my mind is made up
    mum wait for me im coming
    dad you was supposed to protect me... i loved you why couldnt you love me back?
    all alone
    tired... of fighting a neverending war
  2. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    i´m sorry for the delay of my replky, but hun, you can be strong, if you fought against your memories for so long you can beat them, have you ever thought about counselling?
  3. liveinhope

    liveinhope Well-Known Member

    Sweetie please try and stay a while talk to people here, letustryandhelp you through this terrible time hugs
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