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Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by confuzzle, Aug 3, 2009.

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  1. confuzzle

    confuzzle Well-Known Member

    By what measure do we evaluate strength?

    I get people telling me that I'm strong for who I am, and what I've done, both here on the forums...but I don't really get it. Duh, i understand what they are saying...but I don't feel like I'm strong at all. Some times, I feel like I'm so fucked up that I won't ever see straight again. Most times if anything, I would have nothing positive to say about myself.

    I've just had a thought that has been swimming in my head for a while now.
    Who is stronger... a person who has never been suicidal, and maintains a genuinely happy life, or a person who has been suicidal, and struggles to keep all his shit together? They both aim for happiness, but only one can keep it. Does that make the one who is happy stronger, mentally and emotionally, than the suicidal person? Or is strength the result of the struggle?

    Just a thought, any thoughts? Hope it made sense to everyone.
  2. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    I think the one who struggles is stronger because they have experienced so much of life.. The one who is happy usually snap when things go sour.. I think they are more apt to commit because they have no experience in how to cope..
  3. mandyj101

    mandyj101 Well-Known Member

    i agree with stranger .. :)
  4. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Hi Confuzzle!
    I would have to say a person who has stared suicide in the face and still lives is the stronger one. Maybe I simply say that as that is my case but it seems to me that people who walk through this world without ever having had a period in their life of deep introspection (which was what my being suicidal was related to in large part) are avoiding their inner demons and guess what we all have them!

    To me strength results from struggle but from other things as well.
    There is a saying;
    Stress results when the mind resists what is.
    For me this is very true. Adversity is bound to occur in our lives and how we choose to approach that determines our level of "struggle" but either way we come away stronger.
    If we resist sure we become strong but our psyche takes a beating.
    If we accept and deal with the adversity head on then we do become strong but there is less of a struggle and thus less of a toll on our psyche.
    In other words I believe it does not have to be a "struggle" per se and that we can come away from it both stronger and with a deeper understanding of ourselves.
    One thing about dealing with clinical depression for over 20 years is that you learn not to be afraid of adversity as much. I am not saying that it is enjoyable but you learn that out of it will come new and deeper perspective on life-the "struggle" or adversity begins to have a meaning which for me is a comfort. Recall my analogy of the apricot seed? And the dragon analogy? This is those analogies expressed in other words basically.

    What is ironic is that I have seen you grow from your struggle but my guess is that you have not seen that yet but I am confident that you will. Like I said it does get easier trust me! And you too will grow stronger as well as find peace and happiness.

    Sorry if I added a bit of what we talk about in IM to my reply here but for me it is all related.

    Love ya B ...hehe
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 3, 2009
  5. Jemi200

    Jemi200 Well-Known Member

    Suicidal people do get happy when they're out of their rut. One of the only non-fixable things in life/death is suicide. Living through suicide attempts is much more formidable than a normal person who hasn't gone through a terrible situation and came back alive.
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