Less than a week till moving time.. I haven't sold anything to help cover rent. I'll be showing up penny less. I need to find a 2nd job within 2 weeks.. I'm already taking an advancememt just to be able to work, so no money coming in from anywhere. I can't screw this up.. I won't be moving back here! These people who claim to be "family" have been nothing but negativity. I'll die before coming back to this situation. If this plan dies, i may as well go with. But it can still be salvaged. The pieces are here.. On another note, why did the two people i loved have to 'leave' i need them now.. To give me advice, to listen to me, to offer support at any hour, to make me feel valuable & loved. My one friend is really trying to help, since they know how stressed i am.. But i want you two back! You can't just die like that... Let me say i love you.. Let me hug you.. Let me apologize.. Help me out.. Please.. Just come back for a day. I'm starting to want to join you.. But it isn't my time, nor my style to give up. Not unless it's for MY reasons. I won't fail your memory by giving up.. I'll abandon my moral code till i'm out of here. Or i'll give up on my terms.