I feel so stressed all of the time. I hoped things would get easier as I got older but I'm still much the same as I was in high school, struggling with my education. I struggle to find motivation & I'm awful with procrastination. I don't know how to fix this. Last year I finally bit the bullet & spoke to a counsellor because I feared things had gotten so bad that there was going to be consequences. I was trying to save myself from failure. It felt fake though. They always say if you're having problems don't wait till the end cause there's not a lot they can do. I worried she thought that I was lying, making excuses. Somehow talking about my stress out loud to a real person led me to the point of crying, which is crazy, because I rarely cry. I guess that showed the councillor I was genuinely upset. I think I've always had low self esteem & this makes me feel that I'm not worthy of seeking help. I'm uncomfortable talking about myself in person & being the focus of attention. This is probably why getting help has always been so hard. I have good intentions but I just suck at being good. My body clock is messed up. I took on doing an overnight shift one night/morning a week & naturally this affects the whole week now. People keep asking me if I ever sleep. I really need the shift to earn enough money to function, but it has messed up my ability to attend classes. But I know me, even if this wasn't the issue, there would be something else. I always make there be something. My financial position is stressful. I know it could be worse though & many others have it harder than me. It saddens me that life revolves around money whether we like it or not. You have to have money to stay alive & function. I hate having to worry about how I'm going to manage things.