Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Claire Bear, May 24, 2014.

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  1. Claire Bear

    Claire Bear Member

    Strugglin badly. Ex has me in such a state that I can't get control of myself.
    Tried to reach out and talk earlier but I had to shut the conversation down fast. Panicked feelings took over-need for drugs took over which led to me having to resort to my backup plan. Ventured into the chat here but felt so uncomfortable and watched. What's going on with me? I can't deal with this anymore. I desperate to get out of this life but too weak to go through with it.
  2. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Claire, really sorry you're feeling this way. If you want to talk it through or vent my inbox is open, or of course keep letting your thoughts come out on here

    Take care

  3. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Hi Claire, - you desperately want to get out of the life you are living atm, but dying isn't the way for things to get better (although I am very aware that sometimes this seems like the only option available) - I don't think you really want to die, but you do need things to get better for you.

    Feeling weak in this regard is not so much of a bad thing, it's the opportunity to find strength which will bolster your motivation to turn your mind into your friend. I do not know your circumstances, but it does sound like you need to cut ties completely with your ex who is giving you such a bad time. Please PM me if you want to :) Blessings and strength, urP
  4. JennS

    JennS New Member

    OMG! I just happened on this site and thus on your thread! We are kindred spirits! If there is even such a thing in this madness! I am 42, a wife, a daughter, a grand daughter, a mother of 3 and I think of death constantly. You are sooo not alone. As happy as everyone seems around me, nope, not me! I feel your pain...every is a true battle! I hate it. It is almost an obsession....this staying alive! hang in there....I just feel like I should say that! And listen, if I can do, you sure as hell can do it!
  5. overdue

    overdue Member

    Although I support you as a human being, I do not relate at all. I knew at a young age I would not get married, nor have kids (Im an old man). My mind was made up based on the misery I saw in family around me. We all hated ourselves, and each other - to this day, I am embarrassed by tender moments between fathers and sons on television shows or in movies. In fact, I HATE that. So I have no concept of having children - I think if I DID, maybe I would not be almost 50 and going on almost 4 decades of wanting death.
    All I can say is that you HAVE to work to make yourself better - you have generations beneath you who would not want to see you go before your time. It would be so cruel in a way to them.
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