Stuck on the "Easy things" - Life on Standstill

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Jungle420, Jan 3, 2012.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Jungle420

    Jungle420 Banned Member

    OK so my life is on standstill...and it has been since leaving school. I just dont understand how to get what other people have. I cannot find a job (and unsure what to do), I cannot find a girlfriend(and never had one) I have no friends and never have (except one who is a user that I recently decided to completely ignore - because hes an asshole user), I have no transport of my own, I have no one to talk to in the day, or night including weekends, I still live with parents(Who piss me off on a daily basis and never go anywhere, and never go on holiday or do anything remotely fun).. and the worst of all is i dont know how to get any of these things, or change what i need to change..

    ...and no one including the tonnes of doctors, therapists, etc that ive seen over the years has ever been able to give me advice or help me!!?!. I think that goes down to them beinga bunch of useless ****s who couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery but still, I dont know how to help myself and no one knows how to help me. My life has been like this for years. I came from intense fucked up bullying all my life up until 16..joined college and got grades that I worked hard for but got me nowhere... now im stuck unable to move on with life.

    Everyday is exactly the same and I just lay about the house watching the world go by out the window or playing games, or stuck on the computer all day and night. Im wasting my life away and have had deep dark phases of depression that last months..and even when I shift them and i feel really good...they come washing back as I realise it doesnt matter how good i feel nothing in my life ever changes, and the fact that I know I have to go out and change things for myself, but DON'T KNOW HOW TO then that just adds to extreme frustration.

    I do not want to kill myself, because it is unwise an never the answer.. I think you are simply reborn into another body if you do, and you do not learn what you came here to learn or expereince. There must be a first step forward..but what?? ive asked this many times to myself and other people and no one has the answer.... It seems if you font know anyone then your FUCKED and alone forever.. its about who you know and if you know no one then your fucked???? what Should I do ???

    There is no pone going back to college because the job situation is bullshit, and i already have qualifications that could get me a job..and if i even did get a job the chances that it will be a dead end job are about 99%. Thats the last things I want. I'm 21, 22 later this month and i just cant take this any more. the best advice someone can give me is "join a group" oh yeah cos thats gonna sort my life out. I feel like I will be miserable and a loner my entire life.
  2. Jungle420

    Jungle420 Banned Member

    No one has any response. exactly im stuck forever. ill never have a life

    wish I was never born.
  3. ZasuArt

    ZasuArt Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry, Jungle... I'm just now seeing your post or I absolutely would have responded earlier. I don't know why, but sometimes posts just get lost in the shuffle to everyone. I know it's hard, especially when you are already struggling, but please don't take it personally. You are absolutely among friends here.

    I wish that I had the right words to say to heal your pain. I obviously don't have all the answers, but I can tell you that you are absolutely not doomed to be unhappy, alone and friendless your whole life. I know that it's so hard to "put yourself out there" when your experiences with the world have been so unkind. Just try to understand that every single human being has an innate fear of rejection (even the bullies and those who seem to have no shortage of friends). Those of us who have been bullied, abused and mistreated develop a natural armour that protects us on some level. But this natural armor works because it keeps others too far away to hurt us. It makes itself known through anger, defensiveness, avoidance and many other signals that trigger others natural fear of rejection. The solution is really to work on letting your guard down and opening yourself up to friendships and relationships. Take baby steps. You and I are connecting here on SF (and you probably have already made other online connections). If you're feeling brave one day, pop into a local pub and start a conversation with someone. They might not engage, which would be their loss, but you really haven't lost anything at this point. Some people have had an easier start in life, but this is how everyone forms friendships and relationships. We all risk... sometimes the risk pays off, sometimes we have to lick our wounds and move on. I know... it's somewhat oversimplifying, but every journey starts with a single step. You're good and worthwhile. You don't deserve to be lonely and you don't have to be.

    Please keep interacting here in SF, and please count me among your friends here.
    Sending hugs and friendship...T :console:
  4. Void_reality

    Void_reality Member

    Hey Jungle, i literally jus signed up to sf and your post was the first 1 ive read. to be honest im quite suprised how much we hav in common, we're both in shitty circumstances but you can pull through it if you manage to find that bit of extra motivation and can-do attitude. I notice your from england and your not working so i assume your on jsa, in which case i would recommend u go to the jobcentre and ask to be put on a future jobs fund or a 2 month volunteer programme, this will give u an opportunity to meet people and possibly get a job. There are jobs out there if ur prepared to do the crap tasks that might be required but at the end of the day work is a good way to meet people even if u quit the jobs after a few weeks, plus its good for morale. Perhaps even try getting agency work. I know zasuArt mentioned goin down to ur local pub which is always an easy way to meet people (especially if u smoke) but the problem with pubs are the only people u end up talkin to are the who arent really goin anywhere in their life jus drinkin the days away with their doll money. As for the girlfriend situation i cant really giv u any advise as ive never been to good with the ladies. Jus message back if wana chat or want any more advise
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.