Hi again folks. I didn't go to my first class today. Just too depressed and afraid to go. It's really stupid because it would have started 20 minutes ago and I did arrive on school(even though I was about five minutes late, I wound up on this school computer) and It wouldn't have been much trouble getting in. But I just dislike that class, I'm afraid that the teacher will sneer or the other students will look at me with disdain. To top it all off it's music class(I'm a hip hop artist myself) so it piles a lot of pressure on me. Not that I wouldn't deserve it, I mean I do. Feeling good is not meant for me, and I avoided all the stress and anxiety from that class by not going and now I feel super guilty and just plain awkward. I missed a class yesterday too... I'm not looking to somehow validate my not going, but I don't know... I have to deal with my absences with the teachers and it scares me even more. I'm get so afraid and depressed over many little things... It's almost too easy to just let go.