Stupid

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by rachypooh, Aug 21, 2006.

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  1. rachypooh

    rachypooh Well-Known Member

    I am so , so stupid. I sliced up my stomach.:unsure:
    I didnt want to turn to it again but I did
    I guess it could have been worse, i could have taken all the pills sitting on the kitchen table.
    I cant talk to anyone about it, no one around me understands or thinks I am doing fine with everything. I keep things to myself because some of my so called friends freak out on me for no reason, and that just makes me feel worse off than i already did.
    My adopted mum just messaged me and asked if i cut, boy does she know me well. pitty she is so far away, i could really use a hug from her.
    sorry for rambling
     
  2. kidinpain

    kidinpain Member

    its stupid to self harm but yesterday i was thinking of doing it untill my mum gave me a hug but it coud of been worse u coud of taken the pills wich is a bad thing im scared of self harming cus of ppl finding out but this is wat helps me to not self harm think about the summer think about how much u would miss it think of wearing longsleaved stuff ow hot it can get hope it helps
     
  3. rachypooh

    rachypooh Well-Known Member

    I caved in to self harm, but it was no where near as bad as it has been. i confided in my adopted mum and because i told her i was still bleeding she rang the ambulance on me, and the police also turned up. I had to prove to them that i didnt do anything serious and i also chose to hand over a heap of unecessary pills i had in my place.
    I saw my doctor this afternoon, but unfortunately i cant get in to see anyone at mental health because they dont have any workers left. I am so frustrated with the system here.

    I am struggling bigtime right now with wanting to self harm again, i got some bad news today, my fiance was involved in a really bad accident, and he is in hospital at the moment with brain swelling and suspected spinal injuries. i just dont know how to cope with this on top of everything that has been going on with me

    anyways i am just going to shut up now
     
  4. Hi, Rachy.

    You are not stupid, selfharming is not stupid, its very addictive.

    I am deeply sorry about your fiance, i really hope he gets well soon, i hope hes getting the best care. I am quite glad they made you hand over the pills, you could of killed yourself if you were in that dark place where you dont care about anything around you and just want to overdose. From experience, overdosing is sometimes impulsive, and impulsive actions are very dangerous, especially when it comes to harming yourself.

    Have you tried different techniques? Maybe when you feel like you need/want to cut, do something, keep yourself busy, especially your hands.
    Please dont shut up, its best to shout it that remain silent. Well, i know ill always be here if you want to talk or anything, PM me if you feel up to it, i wont judge you or anything, ill try my best.

    I hope you havent hurt yourself again, selfharming is easy at first, you feel in control, on top of it, but soon, you loose the control, and im guessing you are in that position, where youve lost control, or are loosing it. I hope some of this helped or made the slightest sence. :)

    Take care,
    Sarah.
     
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