Suffering

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Multiple Man, May 5, 2013.

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  1. Multiple Man

    Multiple Man Well-Known Member

    All I know is suffering. Its all I feel all the time. Misery and torment. Life is cruel. Can't escape it. Trauma after trauma. When you think things cant get any worse it does. Spend your whole life chasing that light at the end of a tunnel. Chasing hope. But it never comes. I am what I am. I have no power or ability to change what is. The nightmare lives on. It is infinite. Nothing I can do about it. The only sure promise I have is that tomorrow I will suffer. And the day after that, and in the future. Life cannot allow me anything but this fate. I will die this way and thats fine. The only time I feel comfort is when I think about dying.

    This is all I am. Im not worth anything to anyone or myself. Nor to any God. This is all I was meant for. I hurt all the time. Mentally, emotionally, physically. It's hell. I never thought I would say this but I give up. I let go of the dellusions of hope. Let the light dim to nothing so that the darkness can consume me and kill me quicker. I just don't have anything left. Its all gone. There is no depth to how cruel life can be. There is no bottom to misery, there is no limit to pain. The fear, the anguish and despair i breathe it in like air. It is as real to me as the water I drink it is apart of me like flesh. Go to sleep, wake up, time to fail again. There is no peace. Just suffering.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi Multiple Man have you reached out get help from you doc from the community depression is hell i agreee there but the future we cannot see we cannot predict we don't know who will come into our lives that may change our circumstance I do hope you reach out ok for some help because fighting the darkness alone is hard hun With help you can pull through and you will slowly begin to see that light again hgus
     
  3. blackbirdfly

    blackbirdfly Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry to admit that I agree with you. I wish I could give you hope, but I have none myself. I'm sorry you're in so much misery.
     
  4. LostInMyDaydreams

    LostInMyDaydreams Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry to hear that you're hurting this badly. Wish I could help you out in some way but I'm going through a hard time myself.
    You're not alone. :hug:
     
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