Suicidal Again

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by mimiyzzi, Aug 15, 2009.

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  1. mimiyzzi

    mimiyzzi New Member

    Even when my life seemed 'perfect', people looking at me thinking that i should be the happiest girl in the world, I just felt so depressed. I've been miserable and felt suicidal before when I have n reason to. I'm back feeling like this again and the one person who was always there for me before, my (now ex) boyfriend is gone. I was miserable and I made him miserable and I don't know how to deal with the intense misery I'm feeling; I pushed him away. I deserve to be alone. I feel so alone and that everyone will judge me now that have to take medicine to help me sleep and haven't been eating...that i am just an attention seeker. I don't feel part of anything and I'm not seeing the point of anything. I don't get up in the morning. I don't want to live anymore. My life really means nothing. I never was 'brave' enough to do it before but i think I can this time.
    I don't know why I'm posting, maybe it will make it the tiniest bit easier if i know that there are people out there who feel/have felt like I am. Or understand. Because right now, dying seems like a pretty good solution to the depression and the thoughts I have to battle through everyday.
  2. mandyj101

    mandyj101 Well-Known Member

    hi there welcome 2 the forum ..
    sorry ur feeling this way.. i feel like it alot also.. :hug:
    having 2 take medication 2 sleep isnt something 2 be ashamed of..many ppl take them..and if they help u .. then surely it cant be a bad thing..
    have u tried telling ur doctor how ur feeling overall..or did u just tell him/her that u couldnt sleep? .. mabye if u explained how low u feel they can offer u some support?
    hope 2 see u around the forum .. keep posting if u can .. i find it helps..
    all the best.. x
  3. sweetpea0

    sweetpea0 Well-Known Member

    I fell the same way not understanding why I feel suicidal. It's nothing we do or don't. It's just there. Our thoughts can be torches at times. Just hang in there and keep talking. It helps.
  4. mimiyzzi

    mimiyzzi New Member

    How do you live knowing that you've caused so many people pain through your actions? And that the fact you are all alone is your fault? If i didn't feel like this, I would still have my ex.
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