I have suffered from the Pure-O form of OCD for 6 years. I have been hospitalised over it twice and things have got pretty bad lately. For those of you who don't know about Pure-O, I have obsessive and irrrational fears which make me doubt everything. Like I used to have a chronic fear of my Mum dying. For the past 5 years I have haad the fear of being a paedophile. This is very common among OCD'ers but it is truly the most terrifying thing. I have convinced myself I am a paedophile and therefore deserve nothing but death. Every day I feel guilty for even breathing. If I am this person, and there's no way of changing it, shouldn't I simply kill myself? I have had intrusive thoughts and feelings when around my younger siblings before and that makes me believe I have done something unforgivable by even having those thoughts/feelings. I keep thinking my life is a lie because if anyone knew they would want me dead. And then there are days where I think, this is just OCD. But mostly, I have convinced myself it is true. Please give me a reason to live.