Hi, I have been with my partner 3 years now - the first year of the relationship we were happy, very much in love and I had no idea just how messed up inside my partner was. When I became pregnant with our little girl that was when everything came to light. My partner would go on drink and drug binges and disappear for days on end. He would drink and drive, crash cars, have fights and other reckless behaviour. At the end of a bender one time he had to be talked down from jumping off a motorway bridge. He took an overdose and had to be rushed to hospital. He has been diagnosed with Bi polar disorder and now on medication. He has stopped drinking for 6 months and attends regular AA meetings. But despite all this he still talks about suicide. His moods still go up and down and it's like living with a ticking time bomb. He says he feels nothing can ever help him, and I don't understand how he feels and that one day he is going to kill himself and there's nothing I can do to stop him. He says if he knew I was financially stable he would have done it by now. I've tried asking for help but there's not much more on offer than what he's already receiving. He has no hope and doesn't believe he can ever get better and the feelings ever go away. I love my partner, I love our family and I don't want to give up. But I also don't want to carry on, work hard at a relationship and planning our life together for him to one day kill himself and put us through all that pain. I know I don't understand it, I probably never will, to me he has everything. A family who love him more than anything. Why are we not good enough. Why do these demons of suicide torment him? Should I leave and get away before he destroys our family. Or do I keep trying and hoping one day these feelings will go away and we can live a normal life. I feel so lost.