• Please read the thread in Forum News and Announcements pertaining to race related discussion on SF - thank you :)

Suicidal people see things very clearly

Dark111

SF Supporter
#1
Hello all. I often hear how suicidal people are just in a really painful place and so are blinded to hope of better things to come.
I don't buy that for a second. You become suicidal when you see things very, very clearly and what you see is horrifying.
I've made my plan. And I just want to say to anyone else feeling suicidal, you are NOT delusional. No one will care when you're gone. Where are they now when you need them most? They're no where in sight. People who are suicidal see the world and the people in it for the pure sh*t that it is/are. No one will mourn our loss.
 
#2
You become suicidal when you see things very, very clearly and what you see is horrifying
I think you have to see both the horror and the goodness in the world to really see it clearly.
I often hear how suicidal people are just in a really painful place and so are blinded to hope of better things to come
Many people who think things will never get better actually get better. It doesn't happen to everyone, but it happens often.
No one will care when you're gone
Some people have others that are close to them, others don't. One of the things that stops a lot of people from making an attempt is that they've known someone who has killed themselves, and seen the effect that it has on their family. There are certainly other families who seem pretty cold though.
 

Dark111

SF Supporter
#3
Thanks for taking the time to give such a thoughtful reply. However, i have seen none of the goodness you speak of and there is not one person alive who gives a damn about me. Please don't gaslight me. I know my situation better than you. I wish you well.
 

Sunspots

★☆ Braced for impact ☆★
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#4
Please don't gaslight me. I know my situation better than you
May wasn't gaslighting you, he was trying to help and be supportive. Nobody here is going to agree with your post and say "Yeah, you're right. I can see that killing yourself is the right thing to do because there is absolutely no hope of things getting better and you're obviously thinking very clearly".
SF is about support and finding a way to make our lives worth living.

You're obviously in a really hideous place right now and most of us here understand how that feels as we've been there ourselves or are still there too.

If you want to say a bit more about what's brought you here we'd be glad to listen.
 

Walker

Admin-a-monkey
ADMIN
SF Social Media
SF Author
SF Supporter
#5
People often come here feeling much the same way you are. I realize you don't know that because you're seeing that through a lens that tainted with darkness. But why are you here? You sought support in some way so you're not ready to die. You have the ability to make it through this shitty time like a whole bunch of us have if you care to stick around a while.
 

Acy

Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense
ADMIN
#6
I’m sorry you are hurting so much. At first you said thanks to @may71 for taking the time to give you such a thoughtful reply. Then you said you have seen one of the goodness and there is not one person alive who gives damn about you. I think that may71’s reply is an example of goodness and someone who does give a damn about you. And so is @Sunspots’ reply. And @Walker’s. And mine is also coming from a place of caring. No gaslighting. No, we don’t know you very well yet, but you’ve reached out. We’re hearing and responding to the pain that you are clearly feeling.

I agree with Sunspots that we won’t agree with your idea that suicide is the best option. We do support you in the sense that you are hurting, and maybe through getting feedback here, you will figure out other constructive, life-enhancing options. I sure hope so anyway.
 

Dark111

SF Supporter
#7
May wasn't gaslighting you, he was trying to help and be supportive. Nobody here is going to agree with your post and say "Yeah, you're right. I can see that killing yourself is the right thing to do because there is absolutely no hope of things getting better and you're obviously thinking very clearly".
SF is about support and finding a way to make our lives worth living.

You're obviously in a really hideous place right now and most of us here understand how that feels as we've been there ourselves or are still there too.

If you want to say a bit more about what's brought you here we'd be glad to listen.
Way to go sticking up for your buddy. My first sentence to May was thanking him for his reply.

But It feels like gas lighting when someone tells you you don't see the world clearly coz there's all this good stuff. What good stuff?? You think I haven't looked?? There's nothing but sh*t. No one here knows anything about my life. And I don't buy you're "glad to listen" act after your attack on me. Do any of you here ever stop to think that sometimes things don't get better? And what happens then? I really wish a cup of earl grey tea and a sunset did it for me
 

Dark111

SF Supporter
#8
I’m sorry you are hurting so much. At first you said thanks to @may71 for taking the time to give you such a thoughtful reply. Then you said you have seen one of the goodness and there is not one person alive who gives damn about you. I think that may71’s reply is an example of goodness and someone who does give a damn about you. And so is @Sunspots’ reply. And @Walker’s. And mine is also coming from a place of caring. No gaslighting. No, we don’t know you very well yet, but you’ve reached out. We’re hearing and responding to the pain that you are clearly feeling.

I agree with Sunspots that we won’t agree with your idea that suicide is the best option. We do support you in the sense that you are hurting, and maybe through getting feedback here, you will figure out other constructive, life-enhancing options. I sure hope so anyway.
none of you know me. none of you are reaching out with goodness. you're just doing some online job.
 

Dark111

SF Supporter
#9
I’m sorry you are hurting so much. At first you said thanks to @may71 for taking the time to give you such a thoughtful reply. Then you said you have seen one of the goodness and there is not one person alive who gives damn about you. I think that may71’s reply is an example of goodness and someone who does give a damn about you. And so is @Sunspots’ reply. And @Walker’s. And mine is also coming from a place of caring. No gaslighting. No, we don’t know you very well yet, but you’ve reached out. We’re hearing and responding to the pain that you are clearly feeling.

I agree with Sunspots that we won’t agree with your idea that suicide is the best option. We do support you in the sense that you are hurting, and maybe through getting feedback here, you will figure out other constructive, life-enhancing options. I sure hope so anyway.

May is an example of someone who gives a damn? How is it possible to give a damn about someone you've never met? Especially someone like me who calls bulls**t when they see it and is not receptive to phony empathy. I should just go back to snacking on the local mushrooms.
 

Nick the Fantastical Duck

☆☆Ducking Fantastic ☆☆
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#10
I'm going to throw it out there that this isn't a job for me. I'm not paid to be here, and if it was a job I'd have quit long ago. I'm here for two reasons 1) I care about people (yep even ones I never met) 2) My life is pretty messed up and I need this place just as much as the next guy. So now we got that out of the way. FYI, none of this was said in any way other than for your information. There's no attack in my tone here.

You're right, sometimes life doesn't get better. That's true. I can agree with that point. If you look at the base of my life, many things haven't gotten better (some worse). I will never promise anyone things will get better, that's a crap line and I can't promise you that. In my experience things do get different though. My perspective changed. So while many of my circumstance didn't change, the way I view them did. Now, that's me and not you. I'm just throwing out my experience.

I showed up here much like you, and saying many of the same things. I no longer agree with that perspective. I don't see things that way anymore. I know for a fact that people would hurt if I died, my friend killed himself a couple years ago and that shit still gets me. Would the greater population mourn, no. Would most of the people here notice I was gone, probably not. Would that one or two people be torn apart, yeah. When I got here I couldn't say that, and I don't think it would have been true. I don't think I was seeing things clearly then. I thought I was, but it wasn't the case.

I don't know you. I don't know your story. I would like to listen. I can't speak for anyone else.
 

Dark111

SF Supporter
#13
I'm going to throw it out there that this isn't a job for me. I'm not paid to be here, and if it was a job I'd have quit long ago. I'm here for two reasons 1) I care about people (yep even ones I never met) 2) My life is pretty messed up and I need this place just as much as the next guy. So now we got that out of the way. FYI, none of this was said in any way other than for your information. There's no attack in my tone here.

You're right, sometimes life doesn't get better. That's true. I can agree with that point. If you look at the base of my life, many things haven't gotten better (some worse). I will never promise anyone things will get better, that's a crap line and I can't promise you that. In my experience things do get different though. My perspective changed. So while many of my circumstance didn't change, the way I view them did. Now, that's me and not you. I'm just throwing out my experience.

I showed up here much like you, and saying many of the same things. I no longer agree with that perspective. I don't see things that way anymore. I know for a fact that people would hurt if I died, my friend killed himself a couple years ago and that shit still gets me. Would the greater population mourn, no. Would most of the people here notice I was gone, probably not. Would that one or two people be torn apart, yeah. When I got here I couldn't say that, and I don't think it would have been true. I don't think I was seeing things clearly then. I thought I was, but it wasn't the case.

I don't know you. I don't know your story. I would like to listen. I can't speak for anyone else.

That's the most honest thing I've read here, thankyou for that. But just how torn apart would those one or two people you speak of be? Would they be sad for themselves or for you?
 

Nick the Fantastical Duck

☆☆Ducking Fantastic ☆☆
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#14
That's the most honest thing I've read here, thankyou for that. But just how torn apart would those one or two people you speak of be? Would they be sad for themselves or for you?
I'm not much into fluff, which gets me into trouble sometimes. I would have to ask them to get a better understanding, but I do think it would be a little of both. They would be sad for themselves because their friend is gone, but also sad for me. I know I am sad for my friend more than myself. I miss him, but mostly I think of all the things he didn't get to do. All the goals he had for his life he didn't get to accomplish and I know he could have done all of it. It's an intertwined double edged sword, because in part it is selfish and selfless at the same time.
 

Dark111

SF Supporter
#15
I'm going to throw it out there that this isn't a job for me. I'm not paid to be here, and if it was a job I'd have quit long ago. I'm here for two reasons 1) I care about people (yep even ones I never met) 2) My life is pretty messed up and I need this place just as much as the next guy. So now we got that out of the way. FYI, none of this was said in any way other than for your information. There's no attack in my tone here.

You're right, sometimes life doesn't get better. That's true. I can agree with that point. If you look at the base of my life, many things haven't gotten better (some worse). I will never promise anyone things will get better, that's a crap line and I can't promise you that. In my experience things do get different though. My perspective changed. So while many of my circumstance didn't change, the way I view them did. Now, that's me and not you. I'm just throwing out my experience.

I showed up here much like you, and saying many of the same things. I no longer agree with that perspective. I don't see things that way anymore. I know for a fact that people would hurt if I died, my friend killed himself a couple years ago and that shit still gets me. Would the greater population mourn, no. Would most of the people here notice I was gone, probably not. Would that one or two people be torn apart, yeah. When I got here I couldn't say that, and I don't think it would have been true. I don't think I was seeing things clearly then. I thought I was, but it wasn't the case.

I don't know you. I don't know your story. I would like to listen. I can't speak for anyone else.
I'm not much into fluff, which gets me into trouble sometimes. I would have to ask them to get a better understanding, but I do think it would be a little of both. They would be sad for themselves because their friend is gone, but also sad for me. I know I am sad for my friend more than myself. I miss him, but mostly I think of all the things he didn't get to do. All the goals he had for his life he didn't get to accomplish and I know he could have done all of it. It's an intertwined double edged sword, because in part it is selfish and selfless at the same time.

How do you know he would have gotten to do all those things? He might have fallen flat on his face and been complete a failure and loser .Deep down he probably knew that and so he checked out. I'm dumb as rocks and a female with fading looks. You tell me what I have to offer? No one wants the company of a middle-aged dullard plebeian woman.
 

Dark111

SF Supporter
#16
I'm not much into fluff, which gets me into trouble sometimes. I would have to ask them to get a better understanding, but I do think it would be a little of both. They would be sad for themselves because their friend is gone, but also sad for me. I know I am sad for my friend more than myself. I miss him, but mostly I think of all the things he didn't get to do. All the goals he had for his life he didn't get to accomplish and I know he could have done all of it. It's an intertwined double edged sword, because in part it is selfish and selfless at the same time.

You must be a very good friend.
 
#17
I'm by no means suggesting that your life in particular has been cheery, or will be. I've been on SF for about 10 years now, and while I knew there were horrors in life before hand, certainly what I've read here confirms that. People who've been literally tortured by their families, sold into prostitution from an early age, just horrors that boggle the mind. There's also love and kindness in the world, but not everybody gets their fair share of it. If you stick around SF, you'll see that there are folks who are trying to help.

you're just doing some online job
If folks are getting paid here, no one's clued me in about it. I put in more hours here, and a lot more work, than the job I actually get paid to do. My financial position would probably be a lot better if I never had anything to do with SF.

You tell me what I have to offer?
Maybe you'll be able to find a romantic relationship if you want, but you can also find meaning in life without romantic relationships.

You'll probably be able to see there there's some goodness and kindness in the world if you stick around SF long enough
 

Nick the Fantastical Duck

☆☆Ducking Fantastic ☆☆
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#18
How do you know he would have gotten to do all those things? He might have fallen flat on his face and been complete a failure and loser .Deep down he probably knew that and so he checked out. I'm dumb as rocks and a female with fading looks. You tell me what I have to offer? No one wants the company of a middle-aged dullard plebeian woman.
You're right, I don't know that for sure. I believe he could have do all those things, but I have no way of knowing for sure. I honestly don't know you well enough to know what you have to offer. I'm not about to blow you some smoke, because you clearly are not the kind of person who wants that kind of support. You don't seem so dumb to me. Smarts are measured in various ways, you might not have book smarts (I don't know), but you sure seem be able to follow logic.

Looks are hard one. Not everyone is into looks, some people are and that's just the truth. I couldn't care less what a person physically looks like. I'm more interested in if I can hold a conversation with that person. If that person can understand me and put up with my nonsense. It's more a personality thing for me. That's not the case for everyone though.

So I didn't really answer your question. I don't know you well enough. I do know enough to know that you don't take BS well and I'm not about to feed you some.
 

Dark111

SF Supporter
#20
It doesn't even matter. Tomorrow everything I posted here will be forgotten. leaves in the wind. It will be like I never existed.
 

Please Donate to Help Keep SF Running

Total amount
$95.00
Goal
$255.00
Top