Im tired of being suiciadal self harm brings me no pleasure I can't bring my self to do it so all I have left is suicidal thoughts. I don't know where to go from here I have these thoughts of just wanting to not even exist for the pain and emptyness to just go away, and the one way of making that happen I can't do it im sick of it. There"s no point to life or my suicidal thoughts I can't go through with either one of them im standing on the edge I can not jump and I can't enjoy the view either. Every path I take leads me to nowhere everthing just passes me by, everyone around me continues to grow and im still in my cocoon thinking ill never become a butterfly. I don't know how long ill descend or how far im going to have to fall to find my soul I can't take it much more. I know I have to let go I have to have faith because I have nothing left to hold onto in this dark place. If I end my life I know ill never find happiness inside so with every breath I have left ill try and hang on and do my best.