Suicidal Thoughts - Are you Feeling Suicidal Today?
- Thread starter Petal
- Start date
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Yes. I'm exhausted. I'm breking myself making efforts in everything, giving my all, draining myself... For nothing. I can't win, I never will, I just keep losing. And it keeps getting worse and worse. I don't want to keep destroying myself trying everything to get only rejections and humilliation. I want to be dead.
I've been feeling a bit suicidal the past month.
And I was just thinking to myself how I literally want to commit suicide because I didn't get Windows 10 for my birthday..
I got my depression and anxiety from the very bad thing that happened last year on my birthday..
And this birthday, I just got a cheap computer mouse and that's it.
I wish I got Windows 10... My computer keeps freezing and glitching up for over 5 minutes anytime I click anything.. people told me it's because my Windows 10 is unactivated.. ugh.. I wish I had the money to get a Windows 10 key..
GAH and after I hit post reply just now, it once again asked me to log in again a bunch of times, and I hit back, and most of my post was erased and I once again had to re-type it. I wish I was typing these posts on a PC with an activated copy of Windows 10, instead of with my tablet..
And I was just thinking to myself how I literally want to commit suicide because I didn't get Windows 10 for my birthday..
I got my depression and anxiety from the very bad thing that happened last year on my birthday..
And this birthday, I just got a cheap computer mouse and that's it.
I wish I got Windows 10... My computer keeps freezing and glitching up for over 5 minutes anytime I click anything.. people told me it's because my Windows 10 is unactivated.. ugh.. I wish I had the money to get a Windows 10 key..
GAH and after I hit post reply just now, it once again asked me to log in again a bunch of times, and I hit back, and most of my post was erased and I once again had to re-type it. I wish I was typing these posts on a PC with an activated copy of Windows 10, instead of with my tablet..
Just wanted to say glad to hear this Mike I'm really happy for you & hope it continues! 
Sorry to those who are not feeling so good today but please know you aren't alone, that we care and that we want to help
I guess I'm not today, just really wishing more than ever that I could just be turned into a robot so then I'd never have to be triggered by any idiotic, moronic, ego-based, destructive, negative, fearful nonsense ever again. The word "disappointment" doesn't even begin to describe how I feel about so many things in my life but trying hard not to hate it cos I know that is not a good path to go down
Sorry to those who are not feeling so good today but please know you aren't alone, that we care and that we want to help
I guess I'm not today, just really wishing more than ever that I could just be turned into a robot so then I'd never have to be triggered by any idiotic, moronic, ego-based, destructive, negative, fearful nonsense ever again. The word "disappointment" doesn't even begin to describe how I feel about so many things in my life but trying hard not to hate it cos I know that is not a good path to go down
Did your computer come with windows 10? Or did you download it from somewhere? If your computer came with it, you should also have the product key. They usually don't make you buy it separate. I'm sorry you're feeling bad, but let's not end your life over and operating system. Your life is worth far more than that. Sometimes we don't get what we want for our birthday, and it can be disappointing. This year has been hard on people financially so maybe they couldn't afford to buy the program for you. That's nothing to feel bad about.
Tonight is terrible again and I so badly want to try. It’s all I can think about. I’m jealous of anyone whose attempted or been in hospital. Sounds crazy? I wish that was me. Somehow I’m holding on and if I just sleep perhaps I won’t feel so strongly tomorrow morning. At the moment if I could get there I would do it.
Just wanted to say glad to hear this Mike I'm really happy for you & hope it continues!
Sorry to those who are not feeling so good today but please know you aren't alone, that we care and that we want to help
I guess I'm not today, just really wishing more than ever that I could just be turned into a robot so then I'd never have to be triggered by any idiotic, moronic, ego-based, destructive, negative, fearful nonsense ever again. The word "disappointment" doesn't even begin to describe how I feel about so many things in my life but trying hard not to hate it cos I know that is not a good path to go down
Sorry to those who are not feeling so good today but please know you aren't alone, that we care and that we want to help
I guess I'm not today, just really wishing more than ever that I could just be turned into a robot so then I'd never have to be triggered by any idiotic, moronic, ego-based, destructive, negative, fearful nonsense ever again. The word "disappointment" doesn't even begin to describe how I feel about so many things in my life but trying hard not to hate it cos I know that is not a good path to go down
Yes. Everything is useless, I'm giving my all for nothing. I lost everything I love, need or want and I am here, destroying myself making huge efforts in every area of my life to be good enough while random people who take everything from me are just enjoying and being happy. Don't want to live like this. I want to be dead.