Suicidal

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Deathwish89, Apr 10, 2015.

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  1. Deathwish89

    Deathwish89 New Member

    I've never posted here before. I don't know why I am. It's not a cry for help. I just feel so alone. My fiancé is going to leave me. We have been together 5 years. I'm at work right now so I have to keep from crying but I've been having these thoughts of how I need to end it. I've thought of ways to do it. I e had attempts in the past that didn't kill me. I think I'm crazy or mentally ill. I don't know why. I can't tell anyone or I may lose everything even more. I can't tell my fiancé as he will think it is for attention. I know sleeping pills don't work but I'm tempted to try anyways when I get home from work. I just lost all will to live. I hate when people say to go to the hospital. Get help. Talk to a therapist. It won't change anything! I will still be me in this mess! I still won't have friends or people who notice lol be gone. At work they will shake their heads and say how sad and that we don't know what people are going through but the next day it will normal. My death won't matter to anyone.
     
  2. Multiple Man

    Multiple Man Well-Known Member

    Presumably, after investing 5 years of your heart and soul to this person I can understand you being at the height of your turmoil right now. If there is no way to reconcile then just try to get to a place mentally where you can think and be as calm as possible. Even if you have to leave work early or take days off. It is a mistake to place all of your self worth in someone else even the person you love. They are not worth you taking your life. Hoping as time passes those thoughts will come and go. I know your hurting but at least give yourself time to come down emotionally, grieve about it, put everything in context and realize you gave your all and if this person cant understand or is taking you for granted maybe its for the best, but I dont know the entire situation, but it wont feel this way forever.
     
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