Hi, I'm 26/m and have been feeling extremeley depressed, where each day feels worse than the last. I have contemplated suicide but I do not want to burden anyone with my death, especially my parents. I've pretty much given myself a few rules on suicide. I will be as discreete as possible if I ever do commit it, not telling anyone and doing it in a secluded far off location as to not bring attention. I will neverr do something like get drunk and drive or crash into something with my car (anything that could potentially harm anyone else). My ideal option at this point would be to put myself in an organisation (army perhaps)? that benefits the world yet is dangerous so that I may die but do so in atleast a more honorable way so as to not leave such a negative or emotional impact on my friends and family. I am also planning on taking out a life insurance policy now and forcing myself to wait through the 2 year limit because after that point, any type of death is covered by most policies and it will pay my parents. My even considering this, I know I am being selfish, but if I can atleast leave them enough money but having a life insurance contract, it makes me feel a little better. As I am 26, can someone please suggest something that I could join which would provide the outlet I am looking for. Thank you.