In this dream I seemed to be a guy. Lovely. I also seemed to have a brother, who may or may not have been my actual brother. I honestly don’t know, but my actual mom was in the dream. Anyway, the first thing I remember is watching fireworks in a field. We didn’t even know that the fireworks were going to happen, they just did. The entire show was like one huge finally. Eventually, what appeared to be miniature rockets flew across the sky. Everyone started freaking out, and I ran into the house. For some strange reason the house seemed to be a two story house and I went into the spare bedroom. Once there, an old woman appeared (or maybe she was speaking in my head) and told me that I had to kill myself like my other brother did. I argued for a while that I couldn’t do something like that, but somehow she persuaded me to do it. So, I went into the den and examined the chandelier and the chain it was attached to. It was rather low to the floor, but I figured I could make it work. I wrapped the chain around my neck and tried to hang myself, but I slipped out of the chain and fell to the floor. My brother then came through the door and started trying to talk me out of suicide. I ignored him and wrapped the chain around my neck again. This time it seemed to work. I hung from the chain for several minutes feeling the blood supply in my body being stopped by the chain and my very life slipping away. I was completely calm throughout this entire thing, and felt no fear whatsoever. I was almost all the way dead when I woke up. Even in the bed I still felt that strange sense of dying. This is getting bad. I want to kill myself so badly I am actually dreaming about it.