suicide
something i think about a lot...
i no longer know the difference between happy me and suicidal me
is there a difference?
I've been suicidal so long im not sure i know how to not be...
"i can end it whenever i want"
the thought that kept me going so long
the thought that if things got any worse i could just end it
but what now?
things are getting better
yet i still think suicide
i don't understand
im meant to be getting better
better is meant to mean no more suicide thoughts
why are they still there then?
maybe i am meant to just end it
maybe im meant to be gone
maybe im not better
suicide what makes me always come back to this thought
this one word
this one thing that is the diffidence between me being here and me not
suicide probably is my best bet
could i do that though?
could i make it all go away
ive thought about it so long
i dont think in my worst i could have done it
didnt have the focus to make it happen
now? now idk
i think now i could
am i going to?
idk
im so torn i just dont know how to live...
something i think about a lot...
i no longer know the difference between happy me and suicidal me
is there a difference?
I've been suicidal so long im not sure i know how to not be...
"i can end it whenever i want"
the thought that kept me going so long
the thought that if things got any worse i could just end it
but what now?
things are getting better
yet i still think suicide
i don't understand
im meant to be getting better
better is meant to mean no more suicide thoughts
why are they still there then?
maybe i am meant to just end it
maybe im meant to be gone
maybe im not better
suicide what makes me always come back to this thought
this one word
this one thing that is the diffidence between me being here and me not
suicide probably is my best bet
could i do that though?
could i make it all go away
ive thought about it so long
i dont think in my worst i could have done it
didnt have the focus to make it happen
now? now idk
i think now i could
am i going to?
idk
im so torn i just dont know how to live...