Suppression

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by LetItGo, Feb 23, 2008.

  1. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    Ive read about how other people have attempted this, but do you think suppressing sexual urges could eventually mean that one day you wont have any? If you dont give in to self satisfying etc....eventually you lose the desire altogether, anyone else had success with this?
     
  2. twilight

    twilight Well-Known Member

    Sorry I can't help you but why would you want to? It seems like the happiest I have been is when I was with someone.
     
  3. Lead Savior

    Lead Savior Well-Known Member

    I think after a long period of time and many successfully resisted urges, you will gain confidence and the ability to ignore it.

    But I don't think the urges will ever disappear altogether.
     
  4. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    There are people who are asexual, but not many.
     
  5. Fatman1966

    Fatman1966 Antiquitie's Friend

    I have managed it for like nearly 20 years, I'm 41 now, you just can't switch off those kind of thoughts, as a guy its not phyicaly possible, after a while fliuds build up and find there own way out, when your are asleep and dreaming about stuff, if you know what I mean ;-)

    But as far as having sexual feeling for other people, unitl recently I managed just fine, just doing what guys do, that was enough, if you get my drift, sexualy at least, but it was the lack of close human contact that got to me in the end.

    Now things are different, I have got to grips with my depression, I am much more comfortable with who I am, despite being hurt in the past, I am willing to give it a go and risk getting hurt again, why ? well after a while the pain of being alone all the time became worse than the pain of being rejected by other guys, I'm gay after all, although it took me like forever to work out, in the end, living like I was living, well exhisting really, keeping ever one and every thing out of my life, I was just hurting myself more, keeping myself in that painfull emotional place.

    Its hard, really hard, espicialy having been so guarded and single for so long to trust other people, to share with other people, to risk being hurt by other people, but right now, despite still not being sexual involved with anyone, I feel better than I have done in years, more alive than I have done in years

    Some times it just doesnt pay to let yoursellf become comfortabley numb !
     
  6. klodo

    klodo Well-Known Member

    I have found that ignoring the urge now is like trying to ignore the worst itch of my life. Impossible,for me anyway. Mind you I did go many years without masturbating simply as I had no or little urge at the time and the sperm came out in my pee instead, I only had 3 or 4 wet dreams in 15 years so perhaps if you do manage to go long enough the urge really does vanish.
     
  7. ggg456

    ggg456 Guest

    No it doesn't work. It usually comes out another way, either you try desperately to get rid of the feelings, you numb yourself, you try and escape, you treat others horribly, but it's always there- it's the same with any kind of desire for something. What helped me recently was saying, 'forget it, I'm not going to get rid of what I feel for someone, whether he likes it or not, it's there.' And after that, my eating improved dramatically! I have had bad anorexia last year out of lots of reasons..
     
  8. Panther

    Panther Well-Known Member

    I don't know, if it was possible then it would probably vary from person to person I would think.
     
  9. BOLIAO

    BOLIAO Guest

    after i went on cymbalta, i have no drive at all and have become impotent. but the med helped me tremendously to a certain extent on my depression though.
     
  10. Christianv2

    Christianv2 Well-Known Member

    I think the people that no longer go after sex or are interested in that, are people who have had years of frustration with no success with the opposite sex so eventualy there drive dies and thats about it. I know for me I feel less and less stimulated as time goes on and Im on the pretty young side, so thats kinda depressing but I think its because I went to having frequent sex for a year or two straight to being celebate without choice for a year.
     
  11. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    Any ideas of suppression have gone out the window for me lately. Aside from lingering doubts about having a physical relationship with my friend, I decided I should exercise some self control for a while to alleviate some very minor and temporary physical issues (pain), nothing major, but it didnt last long lol...Its not easy when you live together, kiss and hug to show a person you care about them, and quite often one thing leads to another etc...I dont regret any of it though, its really nice to share that intimacy with someone you trully care about.
     
  12. whybeherenow

    whybeherenow Active Member


    Hi - on the same side of the fence and born in the same year.

    I could almost be asexual - it doesn't pain me to not have sex. Thing is I fall in lurve. And I do mean fall. Hard.

    To MJ - suppression/repression will not work. It's that simple. So whatever you want to suppress - you need to face head on. Easy for me to say, not so easy for you to do I know!