Background info: I'm from Florida, i'm 17 years old. So, I just got out of the Mental Hospital and decided to come here for support and help recovering from my 'depressive' state. My psychiatrist also said I should associate with people. Either way. One week ago, I ran away from home with a gun, because I was just sick of everything in life. For some reason the police listed me as armed and dangerous, and SWAT came to my friend's house. Where I was saying my goodbye's to my BEST friend. They happened to come while I was there. So I was holed up in the house.. With a gun and one bullet, with SWAT outside. I counted to 60. Told myself I couldn't do it, told myself I could do it, repeated that over and over till 60. At 60. <Mod edit: Method> Everyone's telling me it's my "second chance" at life. I just see it as.. I really don't know. Either way. I feel so embrassed, all my friends look at me like a freak now. My parents look down upon me. Nobody looks up to me anymore. It sucks.