Empathy Only Taking a break

Leesa

Well-Known Member
*hug could you get dentures instead of the 3,500 bill for dental work?
I replied to this by my phone but I guess it didn't take. The answer is an adamant absolutely not. This threat is empathy only. That's not meant to sound harsh as I know it might come across that way. No advice please.
 

Dwight

Another day gone...one day closer to death...
SF Supporter
I'm confused. You told Thauoy that caring wasn't enough, but you tell Black Opium that this thread is for empathy only, no advice. What DO you want Leesa? I relate to your thread so much & have felt/am feeling many on the same things you are. But you have to decide what you want out of SF first & foremost, I think. If you just want to vent & work through issues on your own, or are open for advice, comfort, and/or recognition of your issues? I'm 62, so I definatley relate to the age thing.
 

Leesa

Well-Known Member
I'm confused. You told Thauoy that caring wasn't enough, but you tell Black Opium that this thread is for empathy only, no advice. What DO you want Leesa? I relate to your thread so much & have felt/am feeling many on the same things you are. But you have to decide what you want out of SF first & foremost, I think. If you just want to vent & work through issues on your own, or are open for advice, comfort, and/or recognition of your issues? I'm 62, so I definatley relate to the age thing.
I post on other threads if I want advice. This is just a thread to share how I feel. My stating caring isn't enough is
how I feel but the comments did not go unappreciated. I do not want advice on this thread. This is why I posted under empathy only.
 

Dwight

Another day gone...one day closer to death...
SF Supporter
I post on other threads if I want advice. This is just a thread to share how I feel. My stating caring isn't enough is
how I feel but the comments did not go unappreciated. I do not want advice on this thread. This is why I posted under empathy only.
I gotcha. Sometimes we all just need to scream a bit. Totally with ya there! I hope I didn't offend...
 

Leesa

Well-Known Member
Spent two hours with the therapist today. We've been working together 5 months. She likes me. I like her. She has been a therapist for about 20 years and has been able to help people. Today we couldn't think of a reason for me to live. She's a very positive person and wants to help but doesn't know how. I was very calm and she was trying hard not to overreact. I don't have a reason to live. My core human needs are not being met. The reason to not kill myself is the possibility of failure. That's not the same as a reason to live. It was a very sad morning.
 

Leesa

Well-Known Member
Well, besides all of this isolation and worried if I'll have a job ( I was already petrified about my financial future), I just found out yesterday I've started menopause. Never been loved, no family, and this just points out I didn't take the journey I wanted. Plus I just got an invitation to my nephew's wedding. It upset me so much I tore it apart. I'm not getting anywhere and death is all I want. My therapist says she wants to help but doesn't know what to do. She understands my pain because everything just gets worse. All she can do is say " I'm sorry " she doesn't know who can help me. I don't have the answers within me except I shouldn't have been born. I just had my birthday this week and it is so clear I do not have a place.
 

sinking_ship

woman overboard
Staff Alumni
SF Supporter
*console

That is a lot. I can imagine the menopause is a really hard reminder.
I am frustrated for you that your therapist doesn't seem to have a path forward for you. I know a lot of what you deal with is rooted in actual practical type problems, but that certainly doesn't mean you're a lost cause.

I would wish you a happy belated birthday, but that sounds wrong in this context. Instead I will wish for a better year ahead for you.
 

Leesa

Well-Known Member
*console

That is a lot. I can imagine the menopause is a really hard reminder.
I am frustrated for you that your therapist doesn't seem to have a path forward for you. I know a lot of what you deal with is rooted in actual practical type problems, but that certainly doesn't mean you're a lost cause.

I would wish you a happy belated birthday, but that sounds wrong in this context. Instead I will wish for a better year ahead for you.
Thanks. It is more like menopause at warp speed. Last May I had blood work and they said I wasn't even near the beginning. My previous therapist ( aged 30) gave me a high five. Now my hormones are so different that it's like I went through it all in a very short time span. It's not over but she said very close, even though I may experience symptoms for a while. My main thing has been a racing heart (for which I now have to see a cardiologist), acne ( which I didn't have as a kid really), some night sweats but they're so mild that it's more like a warm room. I didn't anticipate this happening so quickly. I've watched my body grow old very fast (I had really good vision until a year and a half ago but now require glasses or contacts) and my finances are shot. I was financially in a better place 20 years ago. I wasn't ugly although I felt it and no therapist could help me. This one ( and the last) are very compassionate but they've never dealt with anyone with my 'problem', which makes it all the more isolating.

After 30 years, I have yet to find a therapist who has helped someone with my problem.

Yeah, no Happy birthday wishes. Thanks for not doing that. Sincerely.
 

Leesa

Well-Known Member
I've been on this site for almost a year. ( In a of couple weeks.) It has only gotten worse. I can't think of a single reason to live.
 

Leesa

Well-Known Member
Today I went to the therapist and told her I've tried to find a reason to live. I can think of a reason to not attempt to end it: fear of failure. Not the same as a reason to live. She said she didn't want to talk about it. I can't think of one thing and she can't dispute it

She contacted another therapist but she's not taking new clients.
 

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