Teenage Sex/Birth Control

Discussion in 'Soap Box' started by FoundAndLost1, Feb 7, 2008.

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  1. Please read carefully:

    I’m starting this thread – a separate one - as a result of someone in another thread putting forth the notion that sex without protection is irresponsible and selfish – in effect, especially as regards a resulting unwanted pregnancy, often leading to abortion as an option.

    This is NOT a continuation of that thread…but a segue into other relevant and fundamental issues.

    In a “perfect” world, ideally, we would indeed ALL be educated and informed, early on, to make sound choices and decisions about sexual issues, and concerns. In a “perfect” world, there would be openness and frank discussions, and no fear of asking “silly questions” to someone who might know more than we do/did. But that place is neither HERE nor NOW, due to many existing and undeniable ‘imperfect’ factors. These include (but are not limited to) such things as early exposure, “experimentation/exploration”, peer pressure (as well as societal/cultural/media portrayal of ‘roles’ and expectations), personal self-image and “fulfillment” issues, acceptance, “proving” your love for someone, “how far… how soon”, “spontaneity and/or timing”, information (or MISinformation) received and believed…and what that source was/is.

    I invite members (presently ‘young’, or ‘older’ w/memories) to express their views (and only as candidly as they wish, of course), most especially relating to their own experiences, their notions (learned ‘formally’, or through “word-of-mouth”), and how their knowledge has been expanded on – or even if they have wished to learn more (and again, what sources were ‘chosen’ – reliable or otherwise).

    :dry: I’d prefer not to hear (though it might be inevitable…) such things as “NO SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE! PERIOD!!” This, to me (no offence), is all-too-often quite unrealistic (though it does occur, and might even be your belief. However it's not everyone's, and is therefore rather impractical to apply to everyone), especially since becoming sexually active happens at earlier and earlier ages (not to mention that aside from media influences, scientific studies are showing that young bodies are actually physically maturing, as well, at earlier and earlier ages due to environmental causes such as additives/chemicals and/or hormones in our food sources, water supplies, or around us)…

    This thread may of course be as informative as divisive…Let the games begin.
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2008
  2. Bigman2232

    Bigman2232 Well-Known Member

    Well I can't talk about anything by experience because I don't have any. What I do have is a lot of knowledge on the risks and what to be aware of.

    So here's my opinion. I think that teaching abstinence only is a complete waste time and tax payer money. I think being taught sex ed which includes information on contraceptives and birth control as well as that ultimately abstinence is the only 100% safe method is the way to go. Being taught this stuff does not lead to teenagers having more sex as some may say. Ignoring the fact that teenagers are walking hormone factories and thinking that threatening them works, is what leads to more sex.

    I think one of the biggest problems is the fact that people are still such prudes and largely try to ignore the idea of their sweet little child doing the "nasty". More than likely it is going to happen, either now or somewhere down the line. I would rather have a kid learn from a teacher (sex ed) or a parent than from other kids who don't now much better. And as we all know, when something is banned or we're not supposed to do it, then you want to do it even more.

    Teaching birth control will reduce the risks that go along with sex in these times but it is also important that when you inform kids about it, that you teach them that birth control reduces risks but does not get rid of them completely and that it is not an excuse to just have sex with whoever.

    Our society is fucked to put it primitively and it really can be traced back to around the time the women's liberation movement took place. I'm all for women having equal opportunities but when they moved out of the house and into the businesses, nothing replaced them at home. Our society has crumbled to the point where we have kids basically raising themselves because either the one parent or both parents have to work to keep the family supported. This is not necessarily the parents fault but rather the 24 hours is too short society that we have created. It needs to get back to where one of the parents, either mother or father can focus on the house and raising kids.

    There is no preventing kids from making bad decisions (well some may see them as bad). The only thing we can do is make sure that they are as informed as possible so that they can make their decision with most of the possible consequences known.
  3. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    I was told that sex before marriage was a bad idea, but when I started getting serious with my boyfriend, my Mom sent me straight to the doc for a frank discussion and a birth-control prescription.
  4. hammockmonkey

    hammockmonkey Well-Known Member

    I mean its all about knowing the tricks, like if a girl's on top she can't get pregnat, what goes up must come down.

    that's just gravity.
  5. I agree with just about all you said, and I also agree with "latch-key kids" being an issue -a sad state of affairs, with a lot of repercussions. However, pre-marital sex has been going on long before women entered the workforce (try, um, forever!). Not to mention that it's not the first time in our (even contemporary) history that women worked outside the home (nor does one parent being home offer any 'guarantees' of children refraining from untoward activities). Furthermore, it's perhaps not even 'exclusive' to young people, but even armed with knowledge, most of us (if not at one time, then another) have felt "immune" - that it (anything...) happens to 'other people' - not us (!), that nothing bad could happen - perhaps it's an "occupational hazard" of being human. To add to all of this is the fact that children are being "sexualized" (targeted/marketed to) at earlier and earlier ages, most especially through the [ubiquitous] media in all its forms.

    The there's also this 'new' phenomenon (is it? It wasn't around when I was growing up) - "Friends with Benefits"...

    And it's unfortunate that not all mothers are as 'enlightened' as Anastasia's mum was - still perceiving (um, both parents I mean) that supplying knowledge/information is a 'free one-way ticket' to promiscuity (and perhaps also as relevant, that males are not as often, even today, indoctrinated/informed as females might be)...

    And yeah, such "myths" still persists (the GRAVITY factor - sheesh), just as "you can't get pregnant The First Time"...(or 'early withdrawal'...)

    Last edited: Feb 8, 2008
  6. Smashed__

    Smashed__ Well-Known Member

    I don't know if you're being sarcastic or what but please don't spread false information.
  7. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    Just because our bodies may be physically maturing at a earlier age doesnt mean we ought to be fucking at the age of 11. I doubt we are emotionally maturing any earlier by some of the little brats I've seen around lately. Some girls are getting periods at like 9 or 10, meaning they can get pregnant at that age. Can you imagine these 'kids' dealing with sex, abortions, contraception, child birth even, most likely their pelvices arent even developed then. ARGH. People dont need to be having sex so young. Enough said.
  8. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    are you taking this seriously? :laugh:
  9. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    It is not just teenagers that need to be looked at here. I have had a couple of friends who were both in their 20's who have had abortions. They got pregnant through being irresponsible. It drives me mad that they both are not any better and have not learnt from their mistakes. One of them in particular really gets to me as she has slept with over 100 men and does not use protection other than the pill which she always forgets to take. Talking to her about it she would not think twice about having another abortion if she got pregnant again.

    I come across as a anti abortion protester. I am not totally against it but should not be relied on as a method of sorting out stupidity again and again. It must cost the NHS thousands to sort out peoples mistakes. OK, so you get pregnant and after serious consideration you decide to abortion is the best way forward. But what about these people who dont consider it and use it as their back up method.

    As for the increase in teenage pregnancies... kids need to be taught sex education from a young age. I went to a catholic school and we were not taught anything about condoms etc as in the eyes of the catholic religion sex before marriage and contraception is wrong. Open your eyes for goodness sake. People are having sex from a younger age now, not that it is right but it happens. At least educate them so they know what to do.Some of the stupid things I have heard people come out with... like you cant get pregnant your first time. Then you have the people who decide to get pregnant just so you can get a council house and lots of benefits. It makes me sick.

    So I drink and I smoke but I know one thing. When we decide that we are going to have children together and I find out I am pregnant I will stop. A child is the most precious thing you will ever have - respect the privilidge that you can have kids and do what you can to ensure that it will have a good upbringing and that it will be happy!
  10. Precisely... I wasn't by any means 'condoning' it, but simply adding that this is also one of many contributing factors. And no, the young body is not ready to give birth for quite a number of years - it's dangerous for both mother and child...(even my 17 year old niece just had a C-Section a few months ago...)
  11. You made a lot of good points - however, as I originally stated, this thread is an 'attempt' at getting to the root of this continuing phenomenon, in teens in particular - not a continuance of the abortion issue. But I can empathize...sadly and frustratingly, I too know several women (not girls) who couldn't apparently put the puzzle pieces together and take reliable precautions (my ex sister-in-law presently has 5 children from 4 fathers!). But I digress - sorry!

    I'm rather more interested in personal experiences relating to what one learned, from who, and when - and yes, even exploring so many of the faulty myths that still prevail. What was effective - if it was? What misconceptions (bad pun, but not intended) did one encounter... I too, born RC, concede that religious upbringing (and often the lack of providing important information - though by no means exclusive to ones faith background) sadly adds yet one more rather huge factor into the equation...
    Last edited: Feb 9, 2008
  12. hammockmonkey

    hammockmonkey Well-Known Member

    sorry, just watched knocked up and couldn't resist.
  13. ggg456

    ggg456 Guest


    I wrote an essay there, maybe I'll make it shorter another day :laugh:
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