You know what mum, i wish you would fucking do it cos then maybe you'd leave me the fuck alone. Do you know how much i fucking hate you?! i fucking hate you with every part of my fucking body! Nothing to be depressed about?! how about having a fuck up of a mother like you! you actually make me laugh. Your a fucking joke. You wonder why me and Steven turned out the way we did? take a fucking look at yourself! a bastard of a dad and a bitch of a mother, neither of us stood a fucking chance chance. You call me selfish for thinking about suicide? your the fucking selfish one you fucking bitch! How about having years of being ignore. Never feeling good enough. Years all you gave a shit about was Steven. He's suicidle but do you treat him like this? do you treat him like something you just stepped in! Oh and apparently its not okay. It's not okay to feel this bad. It's not okay to talk to people online about it. It's not okay to want to end this shit. Everyone fucking listen to me! cos according to my mother its NOT FUCKING OKAY!!!!!!! So apparently this forum is a fucking waste of time. Gonna have phone cut off. Gonna have internet cut off. Lol thats really gonna make me feel better eh! taking the one thing away that keeps me safe. You know what mother, i actually felt better this morning, now i feel worse and ever. Your'll have yourself to blame. You fucking bitch. You ain't got a fucking clue! I wanna leave this house but i have no where to go. I wanna move out but i have no where or any money to go anywhere. I HATE this fucking house!! i hate you! go fuck yourself you fucking bitch!! Thanks a lot. Thanks a fucking lot!