To those of you who have taken advantage of me and let me believe you were my friends, it is so good to realize once again that I was being F'ed over. To those in my life who decided I was good for abuse, it was special. Not once, not twice... somehow it sounds like a song, but thank you for being there for me in those special ways. What a lucky girl I am. To myself for letting so many people down, I never fail my own expectations, which is good. To myself for clearly being unable to handle living right now. What a success. To myself for failing, miserably through all of this stuff recently. Now - what to do? what to do? what to do?