Thank you

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by MoAnamCara, Nov 7, 2011.

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  1. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    To those of you who have taken advantage of me and let me believe you were my friends, it is so good to realize once again that I was being F'ed over.

    To those in my life who decided I was good for abuse, it was special.

    Not once, not twice... somehow it sounds like a song, but thank you for being there for me in those special ways. What a lucky girl I am.

    To myself for letting so many people down, I never fail my own expectations, which is good.

    To myself for clearly being unable to handle living right now. What a success.

    To myself for failing, miserably through all of this stuff recently.

    Now - what to do? what to do? what to do?
  2. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Okay, hate to ask but I have to -

    need some help tonight pls
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I am sorry your are so upset hun and that you feel noone cares what has caused all this to come on hugs to you
  4. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    TE - thank you, but you don't have to placate me by answering. Even though I asked for help. Theres just a little too much going on.

    I think the best thing is to go back to cutting for right now to stop the pain, the thoughts and some alcohol to help numb and maybe some pills for good measure to make sure I'm out of it.

    Stupid? Yes.

    A choice? Not right now.

    Sorry - this may have come across as a little rude TE - so I apologize.
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 7, 2011
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    YOu don't need to harm yourself hun to get rid of that pain Hell no okay you just scream you yell you let the dam tears fall. Please hun put the stuff away and just go and sit in a warm tub and cry okay let the pain out in a better way please don't harm you
  6. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Its doestn mattre realyy, but tahnsk to you all sofr being theere.
  7. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    Are you OK MoAnamCara?
    Hope you did nothing regretable, if you did please get help.
  8. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Just checking in today and hope you are doing better...I am still waiting for that text...with much caring
  9. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hope you reached out hun called crisis line and got some help for you People care hun they do okay so please call for help hugs
  10. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    I realize I'm only a newb, but is there anything I can do help? One of your posts gave me a really good way of looking at my own situation, and its helped me daily for over two weeks.

  11. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    You deserve better. :hug:
  12. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    You see, I don't believe I deserve better.

    As they say - if you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always got.

    There is always more to one's life story than that which is originally portrayed by the teller. Nothing is ever black and white. I asked, in a round about way, for certain things to happen, to occur. I created an environment for them to escalate and exist. Victim - me? Nope - just a very manipulative human.

    So what I got is what I should have expected, it was and is deserving, all of it.

    So no tears for me, no compassion is necessary. It is wasted on me.

    Pure & simple.

    Again, I wish I had the courage tonight. Selfish? Absolutely.
  13. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    I do not know who you were, or what you did, only who you appear to be now and you seem to need support. So I will continue to offer it.
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