thanks for reminding me...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by KittyGirl, Aug 24, 2010.

  1. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    Mom and I drove up north to my old hometown to pick up my little brother who'd been visiting friends for the weekend.
    I didn't even want to leave home but I figured it would be good for me to get out at least once in the last week...or two...three...?

    I saw many people I knew- people who hadn't seen me since highschool, I guess.
    One girl told me I looked really different. Okay; that's fine. It's true I've changed alot since highschool.
    A guy I went to school with since grade 6 brought up my ex. lovely.
    He was all like: "Hey, I heard about J. That sucks. You two were together forever-- you were like; perfect and stuff! Why'd that happen?"
    Well, *he* broke up with me, so you would have to ask him.
    And then he went on to comment on how tired I looked and said: "Looks like you haven't slept in weeks- are you sick or something?"
    Sure, you can say that. Thanks for noticing how unattractive I am.

    A lady (in the place we stopped to get some food at) asked how I was doing.
    I lied and said fine. What the hell else would I say?
    Then she said: "Are you married yet?" and went on to talk about her daughter (who was my only friend in elementary school) is having her second child soon... owns her own house, is happily married, blahblahblah...
    I really couldn't bother with pleasantries any more. seriously.
    I spoke up when she was finished and said: "I'm unemployed, single and agoraphobic. Today is my first excursion in a few weeks. I have very little hope of ever getting married let alone getting better."
    She looked confused.
    I walked away. -___-

    eff it.
    Thanks "hometown" for reminding me why I don't leave my room.
    Because memories hurt and thinking about how great everyone elses lives are really sucks.
    Seeing people I used to know who think they know me is really shitty and everywhere I look- I'm constantly reminded of my ex.
    We grew up together in that shitty little town.
    I fucking hate that place.
    Glad I do not live there any more.
    Kind of glad I don't live anywhere.

    I'mma go wallow in my sadness now...
    go drink some baby tears...
    y'know. The usual.
  2. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

  3. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member


    That bit where you said how you're really going made me grin. Not that you're in a bad situation...but I can't imagine the look on her face. She probly didn't expect it XD.

    :hugtackles:, hope things get better soon :)
  4. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I think you did well under the circumstances...
    *pats you on back* for trying...
    don't give time may be easier...