I just registered, and when I saw the process, it frustrated me. I was afraid I was going to become so suicidal by the time I got approved that I might not make it in here. But somebody acted quickly. Thank you. Now I'm posting. I do feel suicidal. I don't want to live. I want my life to be over. It is better than it ever was before, but no matter what my circumstances, I'm still me, and I'm still the same worthless turd I've always been.