That really hurts, seeing them together

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by neverdie, Sep 4, 2007.

  1. neverdie

    neverdie Guest

    WOW, that really hurts, seeing them together. I have to keep in mind, they have more things in common then she and I ever had.
    Altho HE is the same age as I am, He drinks, I don’t. I smoke he doesn’t. I make poverty wages, he makes almost double, He’s thin, I’m not. He has all the toys, I got junk. I can see why she likes him.

    What really hurts is that when I first met her, she was on the edge, suicidal, she cut her wrist, hit herself, was depressed all the time. If it wasn’t for me, she would be dead. And she’s treating me like scum, now that she’s cured.

    I don’t understand why she hates me so much? I made her a happier person, She’s laughing now, she’s got lots of money and friends.

    I was so complete when she was in my life. She made me feel young again. I really loved her. She has no idea how much she’s hurt me. Now I want to end it all. I’m no good for anyone. To old, to fat, to poor to find someone else that will make me feel as good as she did..

    I shouldn’t have gotten involved with her. But if I hadn’t she wouldn’t be here. I told her one day, when we first met, that she wouldn’t need me anymore. But I had no idea I would fall in love with her. And I didn’t think that she would treat this way

    I hater her, yet I still love her. I could be a totally fucken prick and tell everyone at work every little secret about her and that would ruin her career, she would be fired in a second, But I’m not like that, I’ll just have to respect her wishes and leave her alone while I suffer in misery.

  2. electronamaste

    electronamaste New Member


    First of all, if I could give you a hug I would right now. I do understand how you feel, even if my experience wasn't entirely the same as yours. It hurts the heart, literally and its an awful feeling -- especially when you've given your best and tried your hardest. But honestly... if it didn't work out then it for your own good. I don't mean to sound cliche in any way but it makes sense. If the person you love is not with you, then it was for the best some how. You want to be with someone who is going to appreciate you, love you, nurture you, nourish you just as you will for them. And it makes me so sad that you think you are "too old, too fat, and too poor" to be with someone. Before you can love someone, you need to love yourself ... because no one in this world will take care of you as well as YOU will. I know that you have a big and whole heart just by reading your entry... you have the capacity to love someone and you deserve to be with someone who will reciprocate those feelings, actions, and words...

    Love waits, patiently. It will come to you. I know it will.
  3. silent_enigma

    silent_enigma Well-Known Member

    If she didn't appreciate your caring nature, someone else will.