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the car's here...

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fromthatshow

Staff Alumni
SF Supporter
#1
Thinking about driving to the park where they have this tower and jumping off. Just can't do it anymore. People have panic attacks. But I've been with barely any sleep for almost a month, non-stop panic. My head is shaking and my lips are quivering, like something wants to come out but I've tried for a month and it won't come out. My ability to resist it coming out is lessening because I have no sleep. All I'm left with now is a wide awake exhausted body.
I left college. My parents want me to get a job but I have a tough time getting out of bed. They think that I'll be ok if I just get up and get active, but I'm walking on dead legs, and my heart is racing like I'm running a marathon even just getting out of bed. What left to do except end it so my parents won't have to put up with this anymore and neither will I?
 
#2
sorry you are feeling this bad :hug:

i know where your head is at right now...trust me.... :sad:

but why don't you try to lean on us. sf is a great shoulder to cry on

:hug:
 

fromthatshow

Staff Alumni
SF Supporter
#3
I love being here. I love the chatroom. I love having you guys to lean on and helping where I can. But I have to leave. I have to go back to my bed to not sleep and the torture of facing myself. And I don't know what's in there. I'll always have to go back, it's never going to leave.
 
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