the cause of your suffering

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by pppqp, Aug 5, 2011.

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  1. pppqp

    pppqp Well-Known Member

    I've been curious for a while now. They usually say that things will get better. But what if it is yourself, not 'things', that makes you miserable? What if your suffering is caused by your own innate nature, attitudes and personality traits which cannot be changed or improved by taking meds?

    Is committing suicide the only way to escape this real cause of suffering then?

    (I'm not about to kill myself now. Just curious)
  2. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    There are ways of beating your own natures or "repetitious cycles". Usually people start by focusing on what they want, or in finding what they want. They also look and begin to understand why they do what they do, or how they feel and think when they are in these places. Then I guess it's about changing your life one step at a time in the direction that you want, and painfully resisting what nullifies you by strengthening that desire and connection to your wants for a better life, until there is a balance and you don't fall into those darkr pits.

    Im sure there's a trillion ways of explaining this, but simply put, the issues we have inside our minds and feelings can be overcome. Our lives can change without losing the best bits of who we are.
  3. pppqp

    pppqp Well-Known Member

    Thanks SBlake. Changing is indeed painful and difficult especially for those who couldn't even see how their life can change for the better in any aspect. Probably this kind of problem is impossible to find a way out no one knows what to say.
  4. »broken_smile«

    »broken_smile« Banned Member

    yeah i think the cause of my prob is manly personality/nature or wtv... so i mostly think im not able to change.. even though i never considered suicide.. :hug:
  5. VALIS

    VALIS Well-Known Member

    I was born depressed. There are some happy memories but an undercurrent of deep sadness from infancy onwards.

    I don't know any different way of being. With or without meds, with or without therapy, in good times or in bad. Except while in manic states, I have been depressed since I was born.

    Maybe it is a little like how it feels to be born gay, being told it's a choice, I get told to cheer up, see the world differently, or not be so serious.

    I wonder if there's anyone else out there like this? For whom there was a state of suffering since you took your first breath?

    oh, and this
  6. twofeet

    twofeet Well-Known Member

    Been depressed since I was five. Have had a few 'windows' of happiness, but mostly sad. But I think the problem's not just "all in your head."
    • Events and other people,
    • Stuff in your head,
    • Determination to escape
    Escape is either a running from or a running to. As long as we're in this much pain, we might as well try running toward whatever it is that other people seem to enjoy living for.

    :rolleyes: God, I'm deep! Sorry. Just thinking all the time these days.
  7. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    No matter what the situation is, it is our perceptions that determine our reactions...each of us has an internal narrative about how we react...sometimes, it is worth exploring how to change that narrative so that our reactions better serve us...J
  8. Lost?

    Lost? Well-Known Member

    I've been wondering the same thing myself. Nothing has happened to me, my childhood was fine, I haven't experienced anything traumatic in recent months, yet I feel terrible. I'm not depressed because I'm grieving or upset about some big change, I feel like I'm depressed because there's something wrong with me that may or may not be able to be fixed.
  9. Nikosu

    Nikosu Member

    i kinda feel like this, yeah ive had some crappy stuff happen to me, through school and home, but i know people who have had worse than me and theyre fine.....for a fact, im a failed artist, i draw manga all the time. ive less than 0% self esteem...ive gone out of my way to argue with people that im not good at drawing :/
    the voices in my head hate me.
    im a soul inside the body of a person who hates me....

    i can have really nice things happen to me but even so my mood wont pick up, its like a virus that overrides the outside world and ill be misurable whatever, just makes me want to end ill never be able to be fixed :/
  10. bhawk

    bhawk Well-Known Member

    Apart from a few sick fucks in the past the majority of my problems are caused by my head.
    When i was younger i always ran away from a place when it got comfortable, i moved all around the UK always reinventing myself, untill i realised you cant run away from yourself.
    Since then and with my having fell for a woman i settled down, i still got itchy feet all the time, wanting to go but i didnt. While settled i finally sought help when my problems nearly destroyed me and since seeking help and being put on olanzapine i have slowly recovered to a point where i would say i am nearly normal, or what i think normal feels like....if that makes sense.

    You cant run away from yourself, so just be yourself but if you need help seek it, i have been both jekyll and hyde, but thanks to help you can progress and get your life back on track.
  11. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member

    most of the causes of my suffering are due to things out of my control. i have a list of complicated issues, so there's no real point in belting them out. I prefer to live in isolation when I can, other people annoy me.
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