The dam breaks

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Forgotten_Man, Jul 29, 2007.

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  1. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I really fucking hate life. I just cannot get myself under control. Every time I start to think I am better I realize I am just damming up my emotions. Seriously, I have been ok for the past few weeks. I have had a lot on my mind. New video games, working out, anime, and most recently a web manga me and one of my 3 friends is going to start. This has kept me relatively content with existence for the past few weeks.

    However, like always I was just damming up my emotions and true feelings. And guess what the dam broke. I really hate this dam, it always blocks the view of real life. It always makes things impossible to see. The truth is never seen when I have a dam up. And then when it breaks the truth is all to apparent. The worthless shell of a human that I am.

    And now I ask myself why do I go on? I cannot make my friends happy, I cannot keep myself happy. I cannot love life I cannot do anything right. I just want to die. Or I want the dam to last forever. Does anyone know how I can dam up these feelings forever? How can I build an emotional damn that won't break? Please anyone?
  2. Innocent

    Innocent Guest

    This dam analogy intrigues me. Unfortunately I don't have answers to any of your questions. But I hear what you are saying, I guess I have a "dam" of my own. Have you tried therapy? *hugs*
  3. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Nah, no therapy for me. I find it to be pointless.

    Thanks though.
  4. TheBLA

    TheBLA The biggest loser alive.

    What makes you think your not making your friends happy, that your dissapointing them? Have you given therapy a chance though? I know its way easier said than done and me, I don't go to any therepy because I think its pointless as well, ha. But my situation is way worse than yours, sorry for generalizing.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 29, 2007
  5. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Well for starters I have to beg one to come over. The other I guess he is happy.

    Therapy is not something I want to waste time on. I know it will not work.
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