The dam breaks

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Forgotten_Man, Jul 29, 2007.

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  1. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I really fucking hate life. I just cannot get myself under control. Every time I start to think I am better I realize I am just damming up my emotions. Seriously, I have been ok for the past few weeks. I have had a lot on my mind. New video games, working out, anime, and most recently a web manga me and one of my 3 friends is going to start. This has kept me relatively content with existence for the past few weeks.

    However, like always I was just damming up my emotions and true feelings. And guess what the dam broke. I really hate this dam, it always blocks the view of real life. It always makes things impossible to see. The truth is never seen when I have a dam up. And then when it breaks the truth is all to apparent. The worthless shell of a human that I am.

    And now I ask myself why do I go on? I cannot make my friends happy, I cannot keep myself happy. I cannot love life I cannot do anything right. I just want to die. Or I want the dam to last forever. Does anyone know how I can dam up these feelings forever? How can I build an emotional damn that won't break? Please anyone?
  2. Innocent

    Innocent Guest

    This dam analogy intrigues me. Unfortunately I don't have answers to any of your questions. But I hear what you are saying, I guess I have a "dam" of my own. Have you tried therapy? *hugs*
  3. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Nah, no therapy for me. I find it to be pointless.

    Thanks though.
  4. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    What makes you think your not making your friends happy, that your dissapointing them? Have you given therapy a chance though? I know its way easier said than done and me, I don't go to any therepy because I think its pointless as well, ha. But my situation is way worse than yours, sorry for generalizing.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 29, 2007
  5. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Well for starters I have to beg one to come over. The other I guess he is happy.

    Therapy is not something I want to waste time on. I know it will not work.
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