the end

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by psykaina, Dec 31, 2009.

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  1. psykaina

    psykaina Member

    I really want this to stop now. No more breath, no more life.. i just dont want to excist.

    I've allways had it this way, but usually i can get through the day without trying to kill myself. I had desided to do it last monday, but its not easy when being on the hospital and all... they found out about my plans and stoped me..

    But this time they cant do anything cuz they're all so busy. they wont noitice if i locked my room.

    i have had this need to die for 15 years now, and feel that its time.. I have tried a number of times before but they have allways "saved" me. last month i died too(for a minuite or so), but they shocked me or something.

    anyway this is it.. this time i am going to die:-D
    bye guys
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi P and so sorry it is so tough right now...please post and let us know what is going on for you...big hugs, J
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Will you talk to us about what's wrong? :hug:
  4. bubblin girl

    bubblin girl Well-Known Member

    how are you?
    welcome to SF, im so sorry about what you going through,I hope the new year be better for you.
    take care :hug:
  5. psykaina

    psykaina Member

    Im just so tired of fighting myself.. I feel that its my time to die now
  6. tiredofit

    tiredofit Member

    so..hmmm...did the forum help?
  7. bubblin girl

    bubblin girl Well-Known Member

    Please give this Forum a chance,people here are so suportive & caring, they love to give advice & they are not judgmental at all.try to exiplane whats going on & hat you are feeling,tell us??
    take care :hug:
  8. tiredofit

    tiredofit Member

    Glad to see you are still around :)
  9. psykaina

    psykaina Member

    I've tried to kill myself everyday the last two days, but something stoped me in the "right" time.. I was afraid that i would hurt those who found me dead, that i would traumatise those who work here ( im in the mental hospital). But I talked to the one person here who i feel i have the best contection with, and he told me that he wouldn't acctually care if i died, that it is my choise. Even though this is what i have waited to hear all along, and hoped to hear so that it will be easier to go all the way next time - it really hurts me. I think that i want people to miss me, but now i know that no one will.
  10. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Sorry but I can not believe that you won't be missed...see right now you feel crappy about you and so it is clouding your is great that you are getting help because there is a way out of the darkness there really is.
    Also I think that person was illustrating a point in that nobody can really stop us from ending our lives if that is what we ultimately decide to do...
    I am glad you are still with us, keep using us as we are here for you!
  11. tiredofit

    tiredofit Member

    Only ONE person won't miss you.
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