The first one is the deepest

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by whoami13, Aug 15, 2013.

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  1. whoami13

    whoami13 Member

    Looking at the scars I wonder sometimes where it all started? Why this? I'm lost right now. My only comfort is knowing that no matter the beginning, there is always the present. Right now, I walk the only road I've ever known.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hugs to you hun i am sorry you have suffered so I hope that you can show yourself some kindness ok no more harming you hugs
  3. Lost and tired

    Lost and tired Well-Known Member

    Its an odd thing really but ive self harmed between 2 or 3 hundred times this year, not deep cuts, just enough to bleed and hurt. At first i did it when i was in the deepest of my depressive phases. Now i do it when im watching the tv and having a glass of wine and feeling relatively not bad. Tonight alone there are 5 new cuts and today actually ended on a better note than it started. Its an odd thing, self harming, and possibly addictive.
    Whoami if i could go back in time i would never pick up that stanley knife. I worry about my scars and fresh cuts being seen by others. Sometimes they sneak out past my sleeves and i see peoples faces change. My friends may have got me a date with a woman i like soon but, without presuming too much, if she saw me with my shirt off she would run like fuck. And i wouldn't blame her. We need to stop this Whoami both of us, so find me here if you need to talk
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