the future

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by wheresmysheep, Jan 5, 2010.

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  1. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    i've been doing well these past few weeks, getting better mood wise aand starting to go out more. But i was just thinking about my future and living life in general and i just feel like i dont want to do it.
    i dont want to put the effort in, i dont want to experience things, i dont want to live.

    i'm strongly thinking of buying meds tomorrow and doing it. or at least have them stocked up for an incase emergancy
  2. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    hey you sorry to hear you are feeling this way and as I am having a bad day of sorts I may not have the best advice to give so sorry but i do care so want to reply as best as i can.
    The feeling of not wanting to try and feeling tired of struggling goes with the territory that is our lives I think, the depression and general negative outlook.
    Try to focus on the hear and now if looking ahead brings you down, that helps me and after all we only have the present moment and the future holds what we can only suppose and guess. Of course our minds being what they are, based upon what we deal with, always gives it a negative spin on the future and that simply is not always true.
    I recommend contemplating the good that is going on the progress you have made of late, which is great.
    WEll hope this helped..sorry but not having the greatest of days but I do care...Bambi
  3. NoGood

    NoGood Well-Known Member

    hey sweetie.

    cad e an craic??

    You just gotta live one day at a time thats all. Dont freak about the future, cause you never know what is round the corner. Worry is a wasted emotion - it does us no good. If you live with one foot in the past and one foot in tomorrow, your going to piss all over today. Im here if you need me. :) x
  4. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    yeah i understand living day by day, but my mum is forcing me to look future ways.
    she keeps saying that i have to get a job or start a course cause i'm getting better, and i have applied for college in September 2010, but she says that its too far away and i need to be doing something with my days now, but even the thought of going to college day after day is just too much for me.
    i feel like a total pathetic thing thats coming across as lazy or something.
    i just dont want to do it any more
  5. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    :D it's hard at the beginning but as time goes by. you will realize that living outside the comfort zone is worth it.
  6. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    i dont want to realize, i dont want to do it. thats the point i dont want to live
  7. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    okay here is deep thought for my mind there is not wanting to live and then there is wanting to die. Subtle but profound difference can I as which on you feel you fall has to do with perspective and how we feel when depressed.
    My thoughts are with asking_advice the beginning is the hardest for us all.
    Take care, Bambi
  8. #1loser

    #1loser Account Closed

    I always try not to think about the future,
    because I know it pushes me further down.
    Just try to enjoy the things you have/see/feel now
    Maybe she just hopes the best for you, your future
    Btw, really proud of you, fucking awesome, applying for school
  9. fweeps

    fweeps Staff Alumni

    Emma, Im not going to sit here and tell you not to worry about your future because just like you..i worry about mine too. Because of this the only thing that works for me is trying to not look at my (future) all at one time...i try to break it down into you applying for school this year would be a piece. One step at a time kinda think.

    Now I am VERY worried about you wanting to get the meds for an attepmt. Please PM as soon as you can so we can saved my life recently and i would like to be there for you. Youre my friend and i will fight for you..maria
  10. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Looking to the future can be very overwhelming...maybe it would be useful to talk to someone to see how it can be broken down in to doable steps...I know how strong and insightful you not forget your strengths during this time...this is easy to do when things feel like so much for you...please PM me anytime...big hugs and much caring, J
  11. TBear

    TBear Antiquities Friend

    Don't have much to add - but that I care...

    I struggle with the same feelings when considering the future - hopelessness...

    Try to hang on for just a moment more... Tomorrow may look different

    Keep posting.

  12. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    thank you to everyones replies it mean alot. i have bought meds just to have them. i dont know what my next step is from here. i'm really not feeling the best as you can imagine i just really dont know what to do
  13. DS

    DS Account Closed

    I don't have much to offer...just a few things to say;
    You have a few tears shed from me--my heart goes out to you, and **HUGS**, and good thoughts/hopes for getting through this. Seems there are good people around you...I hope you'll lean on them.

    You are very much appreciated by so many and by my self, as well. You offer good insights(often fresh/new) differing views that i find worthy of considering and I've noticed others feel this way too. You always seem to give something worthwhile to think about. I apologize my words often fail me and likely i say the wrong things at the wrong moment. I hope you get what my heart means.

    I do know, i would miss you, and likely many feel this same way. You have so much to offer. Perhaps time for you to lean on others a bit, and perhaps they may have some insights. I hope you are able to get through these moments/days and without too much difficulty, and find some way to keep going until a resolution is found or a way to cope. Please keep connected with those who are there for you.

    Bottom Line; **HUGS** for you! Do know my thoughts are with you.
  14. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    i want to do it but i;m scared. i dont want to wake up in hospital
  15. DS

    DS Account Closed

    awwww **HUGS**

    Please....please...let someone here that you trust, know how you feel and what you are thinking....please stay with them and talk/listen(whatever it is that would be most helpful) just for now, during this time...for these moments you are going through...please...Maybe hang out in the chat room...for a be there and be safe a while...find a way to hold on for a bit or let folks there help you hold on... and if possible...could you just move those meds, so you can't see them or reach them while you are on the computer...if you can?

    I know you have found me in chat doing this, just holding on for a moment, we once spoke about it and it helped that you actually understood what i was doing...meant a lot to me at that moment.

    Waking up in the hospital would not be would likely be awful and likely you wouldn't feel very good physically. The only benefit i ever that it gives one a much needed break/space/time out/rest/escape.

    Is there someone nearby, who will take you in for a week or so, and hold you, talk to you, listen to you...offer some comfort and support...allow you to scream or rest, perhaps care for you, and even feed you? Maybe a bit of rest/away time could help a little bit. I'm convinced one of the best things, a true friend (or just a kindhearted human being)can do for us, is be there to offer us a break or rest, some downtime, or temporary escape, when needed.

    My thoughts and heart are with you right now...

    **HUGS** for you.
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