The good.....I'm not suicidal. The bad....in order to get that way, I stopped taking my meds about two weeks ago. I'm bipolar and on some pretty heavy duty stuff....and at the time I decided to start hoarding my meds "just in case". So........I finally went out for the first time in a month. I went to a thing with friends, and was staying at someone's apartment 2.5 hours away. Around 2 in the morning, I got angry/agitated and decided that I wanted to leave *right then*. So I did. When I'm depressed, I don't have the motivation to function. Some days I can't even force myself out of bed. I tried drinking to make me forget, and it didn't work so I stopped. But right now I'm verging on mania/hypomania. Can't sit still, can't sleep, brain is in three million places at once. ETA: and hypomania/mania for me is *not* a pleasant experience. I am an angry, nasty, mean manic. It's good not to feel like offing myself, but I'm not much more functional. Whee!!!!!