The growing rift between Mods and Users

Discussion in 'Soap Box' started by Craig, May 28, 2011.

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  1. Craig

    Craig Banned Member

    Im pretty new here but in the short time I have been here I have noticed theres an issue here. I feel that its something that can be adressed. That we can resolve this instead of letting it fester. Letting it keep hurting the people in our community. Letting it prevent us from coming together and helping etchother as much as we all deserve.

    Before reading this I want to be very clear. I do not want this to become a 'this one time a mod did this to me and Im upset'. I do not want this to be some sort of topic to adress individuial issues. Thats something we all need to take care of in a PM with the person we have an issue with. Im not sure if I have the ability to moderate a topic I start but if I can and I see someone post something along those lines (Mod or User) I will get rid of the reply.

    We are here for help. Were here because we are in pain. Because we need to connect with others and work through the things in life that are causeing us so much pain. That are keeping us from being happy and living life in a way that we enjoy.

    Given the extreem nature of this community every conversation could potentionaly be a life or death issue. That creates a lot of stress. Its a lot to handle. Its a burden I cant imagine anyone carrying without hurting themselves in the process. I know that I feel so bad when I feel like I have failed to reach someone. When I feel like I have offended someone or caused them pain here.

    This creates situations that have no 'right answer' There are too many cases when its a 'loose loose' and the mod that takes action has to deal with the pain they have cused someone. They put themselve in a place where they have their own issues to deal with but they are forced to put that aside to help others. Even when they themselves feel depressed and are falling appart the position demands that they have to reach out to those in need. To help us with our problems when They themselves need the help. They have to push their feelings aside and be there for a person. Too often that person cant be helped and it just drain them and and brings them down.

    On the other side is the users. We are in so much pain and need help. Its hard to think about anothers persons problems when we ourselves feel so bad that death feels like the only way out. When our trust has been violated and sometimes we cant even reach out to get the help we need. When reaching out ends up hurting us more than helping us. When we are in pain and a mod tells us to be quite because of their obligation to the rest of those around us.

    I feel theres a growing rift. Distrust and anger at the Mods and frustration and pain from dealin with users.

    I know in the short time I have been here I have already felt offended and hurt by a mod. It took a lot for me to see her reasoning and I am still not happy with it but I do know she had the best intententions at hand.

    I want this topic to help us work through this. I want us to get to a place that Mods dont feel alinated and users dont feel abused. I cant speak for every one else but I know I need this. I need this community and the support I am getting from it. I am gratefull for the sacrifices mods make for me.
     
  2. NoMoneyToPlease

    NoMoneyToPlease Banned Member

    If the mods are such an emotional mess then they should rejoin the rest of us.
    Do some work on themselves before they lay a number on a mundane.

    If you make a poor choice in appointing your deputies then you should at least have the class to recall them if they're known to spray lead at jaywalkers.

    You are also missing out on one major issue.When a mods and a mundane clash,it's the mundane who takes one step closer to getting a ban.

    Maybe the best thing to sacrifice,one heavy weight to unload while undertaking the self worth journey,is one's false sense of superiority.

    You don't get any better if you thought you were better to begin with.
     
  3. *sparkle*

    *sparkle* Staff Alumni

    and herein lies the problem...

    craig :hug: i realise you actually made the thread with best intentions but sometimes its something that can't be fixed as people's bias is too deeply engrained
     
  4. ZombiePringle

    ZombiePringle Forum Buddy and Antiquities Friend

    I would like to add one thing.... the mods are people that came to SF as normal people. They were not just recruited to SF to be mods. They came here and started out as regular members and were and still are in the same kind of pain that all of us experience. They have at times been shown to be the ones that are most caring on SF.
     
  5. NoMoneyToPlease

    NoMoneyToPlease Banned Member

    I am the problem...well whadya know.it's a good thing that I'm not feeling so low as to become troubled by being pointed out in public as being the one sided wrongness that blights this forum.

    Oh,well I suppose i have my bad days on which to think about this conclusion.

    Post resolved Craig.
     
  6. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Just before i say anything you cant delete any replies only mods etc. can do this. Your right, in some ways. This kind of thread has been made time and time again and usually locked which i also forsee with this one because people become disrespectful because of the hate and bias, and then of course their are some people who are just offensive for the sake of it.

    Thing is im not sure which you are talking about because their are admins, mods and chat monitors. he mods on here mainly moderate the forum, but seeing as i seen you in chat most of yesterday i am assuming you are referring to chat monitors. Thing is with a site like this, who on earth do you envisage making a moderator, chat monitor or admin? Would you prefer to break the trust of people of the entire forum by bringing people who have no problems to run the site? The mods and chat monitors and admins are all people who have been on here for a while, know all the rules and enforce them. They are trusted because people know them, thats why it works. Fact of the matter is if people fail to read the rules and then break the rules then they only have themselves to blame. When people break the rules though, someone has to enforce them and they are the ones who become hated for something you or whoever else has done. How is that even fair? Its your job to read the rules which is the first thing you get told when you sign up, and the first thing you see when you enter chat. Theres even a link, so thats not their fault, people are given ample opportunity.

    Their is only a growing mistrust with people who have never bothered to read the rules and constantly get in trouble. Actually you have it wrong. They have no need to reach out and the mods and CMs i know do reach out when they are in trouble but they are not required to reach out the are required to enforce the rules. They arent their to reach out and have had no training for it but they do because they are like the rest of us, its called compassion. I cant see their is something to work through to be honest. I have infraction after infraction after infraction and have amassed a lot of points while ive been on here and ive had trouble with certain members of staff on here in the past and the last few weeks, so i more than anyone has more reason to hate them than anyone on here but i dont. You see i recognise that what i did was my own doing, not theirs. My behaviour towards people was my problem. All they did was do what they was supposed to. I respect the staff on here because i dont know if you understand this or not but none of them actually get paid. Not even the admins or the person running the site. Personally i think they deserve respect because all they deal with, day in and day out is people telling them, how fucked up and how much of an asshole they are for doing their job. Or because they are staff dont they deserve our support or respect?

    Nomoneytoplease, every single person joined the site because they are in such an emotional mess, who do you envisage will run the site?
     
  7. panoply

    panoply Banned Member

    Power corrupts.

    Give a few pensive people a little bit of power and chances are they'll not know what to do with it. It's why I wouldn't want to be a moderator (I was a moderator on alonelylife.com and quickly gave it up because I felt myself growing distant from my friends). As Anger said, expect this thread to be locked; this sort of thing has been brought up before.
     
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Locking this thread, if anyone has any complaints put them in LtM please.
     
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