The guilt...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by life, Sep 13, 2007.

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  1. life

    life Well-Known Member

    I feel guilty;i dont want to make my family upset when they hear that i am dead...I feel very guilty ...Maybe if my mum wasnt alive i would do it ;but i dont wanna see her suffer....I cant do it anymore;it hurts too much;it hurts a lot...Please god forgive me if i commit suicide and be dead ;please forgive me ;i never ment to hurt no one;i am sorry;There is no way out..every single day of my life i just suffer a lot...Tiers from my eyes;broken dreams;no future;no happiness only suffering . . . . .why are u making me feel like this ?do u like when i suffer? Why dont u just do a miracle and make me feel better?why do u make me suffer?i am not a bad person ;i love everyone ;But i dont wanna be depressed any more...Do i want too much from u god?Happiness only happieness thats all i want...please god dont make me do something that i would end up hurting my family ;please....:(
  2. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    hey there life
    i so understand about cronic illness and feeling like there is no hope... i have issues with my health that go back 30+ years... i used to feel as you do... you are right when you say that your family will suffer if you su... the thing with illness is that every day things are being discovered to ease pain.. heal disease... increase quality of life... but you have to be around to take advantage of them.. maybe it is time for a change in meds or finding alternative treatments to go along with the meds... maybe it is just as simple and difficult... as finding something that you enjoy.. like.. takes your mind off your issues even for a small amount of time...

    as for God .. i cant speak for Him.. i can only tell you some things that have helped me... of which God is one... hope you get some relief soon...
  3. White Dove

    White Dove Well-Known Member

    please dont do it? i would miss you here...
  4. pisces-music-girl

    pisces-music-girl Well-Known Member

    :hug: Don't go. I know I'd surely miss you if I got the chance to know you.

    I know exactly how you feel when you speak about God not listening, not saving you... if he loves us so much, why doesn't he save us? Must we save ourselves or each other?

    Speaking of saving yourself, have you considered getting help? I know that it's a huge step, a gigantic hurdle- telling someone that you're not okay- but I know it will help you.

    Pour some of your guilt onto me- I'm here for a PM if you need to talk.

    :hug: Stay safe, life, and hang on.
  5. life

    life Well-Known Member

    How long should i stay;how long ;just wanna overdose and be dead forever;:sad:....I stopped my medicine and i cry every day nearly every single bit ...If there was a one pill that would make me die i would take it without hesitation....I feel like this year is my last years...
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