The invisible man

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ghost_rider, Dec 9, 2009.

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  1. ghost_rider

    ghost_rider Member

    I don’t honestly know where I went wrong. I worked hard for the job, the house, the wife, the kids. And I don’t exist. I have no friends. I wander around and I am invisible. I am a waste of space, I should have succumb to the urges when I was a kid so I wouldn’t have to pretend to exist as an adult. Nobody gives a shit about me or anything I do. I’ve been depressed for a long time, and now the calling is too strong. I have it all planned out, so it looks like an accident. I’ve played it a million times in my head, and its simplicity is beautiful. XXXX<Mod Edit:Shades-methods>
    I know this doesn’t impact anyone here, I just felt compelled to have told someone before I’m gone.
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 9, 2009
  2. NoGood

    NoGood Well-Known Member

    Hi ghost rider

    Can you stay and talk it out with people here? Alot of us have an understanding of what your going through. It is hard but we can make it through. I know you might say "i dont wanna make it through" but you never know what is around the corner.

  3. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    You well being does impact ppl here....we are here to support you and to see how you can fit in...please keep posting and let us know what is happening with you...J
  4. ghost_rider

    ghost_rider Member

    I dont think there is much left to talk about. I've talked to the counselors, the preacher, and any family that would listen. I didnt come to this lightly, its been years in the making. I'm Ok with it, I truly believe its how its supposed to be. I was scared before, but now I have a foolproof plan even I cant mess up. I took out extra life insurance to take care of the family. The fine print says suicide isnt covered for the first year, but I just crossed that time mark, so I am free to go. Its been all I could do to hold it together for a year, but managed to. Everything is such a wreck, I kinda have to anyway.
  5. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    If you have the motivation to die, you have the motivation to live, if that makes any sense. Know what I'm saying?
  6. ghost_rider

    ghost_rider Member

    Death is the result of life, not the other way around. I just want to use the express checkout.
  7. cult logic

    cult logic Staff Alumni

    That would be an awful way to go.

    ODIECOM Well-Known Member

    hmm, you say you have a wife, kids and a house.

    maybe what you should do is start reflecting on how much your family means to you. assuming they do mean something to you ....

    seems to me that you have quite a bit and dont even realize it.
    yeah, i suppose that you couldnt do anything to change the way things are right now. ok, so much for the sarcasm. i think if you put your mind to it, you will find ways to change the way you think, which in turn will change the way things are. nothing will change until you do.

    i think the way you want out is a very hard way to die.
    surely alot harder then putting forth more effort to change things.
    just when you think you cant .... things will change. but you have to change first. im living proof of that.

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