Everyday is the same, just think about her nonstop from the minute I wake up till the minute I go to bed. Remember all the times we had together, all the promises we made to one another. Her agreeing to marry me and then I remember she is gone and for what? Because she assumed I would stop loving her? I showed I loved her and cared about her for over 2 years, how much more could I have done? It's like what's the point of life if you could have material possessions or money or what ever but you still don't have the one person you love? I have even meet other women and I can't even allow myself to be happy with them, it's really bad. I see things on the news like someone got shot a few blocks away and I think to myself it should be me. They probably have someone that cares about them, I don't anymore. She sends me messages online from time to time telling me she misses me but she is with someone else now, what's the point of even messaging me? I tell her how much it hurts me and she says it upset her to much to know that. I mean I really don't see any point in living anymore. Every ones mad at me right now as well.