I have found that one of the most damaging and destructive beliefs in our culture is that everyone has an ideal job or career (a "calling") and should be able to determine what that is, and achieve it with enough effort, no matter what their circumstances or resources.
I think in many ways this belief just makes people more unhappy with their lot in life.
Some people do get into a job they love, whether through luck or hard work or a combination (I've observed that luck and circumstance --especially financial resources-- play a bigger role in this than most people would like to admit), but in my experience these people are a small minority of the population. Everyone may have *something* they like about their job, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm also not thinking of people for whom work is a labour of love but don't make enough to live on without parental or spousal or other forms of support. I know a lot of artists and writers who fall in the latter category.
Personally I'm not sure I have an "ideal" career, certainly not one that I've ever been able to decide on, and I think my past trauma, extreme sensitivity, social issues and mood disorder are huge challenges for any job.
I've spent a lot of time around people who like to say things like "Leap, and the net will appear!" I agree that for people with financial resources, strong social connections and family networks, this may indeed by likely. What we don't hear about are all the people for whom the net does not appear and they crash.
I must say i do believe in Joseph Campbell's "thousand unseen helping hands" which will assist when you do something you love.... However you have to first know what you want to do, and be in a position to begin.
I've also seen people like my husband who struggled for decades to enact his dream of being a public high-school English teacher (which is a well paid career here with a lot of competition). While he did become a certified teacher and did years of substituting, he never secured a steady job in the public system. Students who saw him in public walked up to him and said he was the best teacher they ever had (I witnessed this on several occasions). He ended up working for international schools with no benefits or pension plan. He also, sadly, ended up hating teaching. I've met several people who achieved what they thought was their dream and ended up just feeling like it was a grind.
What do you think? And please no platitudes.
I think in many ways this belief just makes people more unhappy with their lot in life.
Some people do get into a job they love, whether through luck or hard work or a combination (I've observed that luck and circumstance --especially financial resources-- play a bigger role in this than most people would like to admit), but in my experience these people are a small minority of the population. Everyone may have *something* they like about their job, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm also not thinking of people for whom work is a labour of love but don't make enough to live on without parental or spousal or other forms of support. I know a lot of artists and writers who fall in the latter category.
Personally I'm not sure I have an "ideal" career, certainly not one that I've ever been able to decide on, and I think my past trauma, extreme sensitivity, social issues and mood disorder are huge challenges for any job.
I've spent a lot of time around people who like to say things like "Leap, and the net will appear!" I agree that for people with financial resources, strong social connections and family networks, this may indeed by likely. What we don't hear about are all the people for whom the net does not appear and they crash.
I must say i do believe in Joseph Campbell's "thousand unseen helping hands" which will assist when you do something you love.... However you have to first know what you want to do, and be in a position to begin.
I've also seen people like my husband who struggled for decades to enact his dream of being a public high-school English teacher (which is a well paid career here with a lot of competition). While he did become a certified teacher and did years of substituting, he never secured a steady job in the public system. Students who saw him in public walked up to him and said he was the best teacher they ever had (I witnessed this on several occasions). He ended up working for international schools with no benefits or pension plan. He also, sadly, ended up hating teaching. I've met several people who achieved what they thought was their dream and ended up just feeling like it was a grind.
What do you think? And please no platitudes.
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