The neverending story, and the root to all my troubles?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by crunchie, Jan 17, 2013.

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  1. crunchie

    crunchie Well-Known Member

    I have no self- esteem, I have been coping in all the wrong ways all my life, and I´m pretty sure I know the root to all my troubles. There are two of them, I call one my mom, and the other was my dad. My mom did her part by never supporting me when I have been down, even as she found me on the floor of my bedroom, 12 years old, crying my heart out, unable to stop. For no reason whatsoever. My mom did what she always does. She tells me I obviously have issues, and I need to cope with them. I´ve heard it all.. I should be more social, do more sports, eat healthier, take responsibility for my life. I GET IT! It´s my life, and I´m responsible. I´m responsible for not picking myself up from the floor. I´m responsible for suffering from a very painful stomach ulcer because I havent taken properly care of myself, because I dont eat the way she thinks I should. Also, when I´m down, and feel bad, I still call my mom, for some reason I always have hope, deep inside that this time I will get support, she will tell me that things will be OK. Not that I should do this or that, or that everything is my own fault. Because I KNOW that it is!! But my life sucks, despite exercising, eating quite healthy and having a medical degree. I cant fix myself. If I could, I would not be here, trying to get support.

    Oh.. And my dad did his by leaving
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Im sorry your parents were not there for you hun and you feel that void in your life I hope coming here you will see that people do understand. Sending you the hug that you needed hun and hope that you keep reaching out ok hugs
  3. crunchie

    crunchie Well-Known Member

    Thanks! Nice to know someone is not all judgement..
  4. Hi, I know it has been a while, but I just wanted to say that I understand having issues with parents who have seen a lot of shit but have never really reached out or supported. Mine have turned blind eyes away from a lot of stuff and we have a weird, cordial relationship where I keep kind of reaching for more but knowing realistically that I'm never going to get it. I know they love me but they are just really shitty as parents, I have to say. Anyway I hope things get better and I hope you can love yourself more and boost your esteem and be rid of some things soon. Feel free to message me if you'd like to talk more, I'd love to hear an update on how you're doing!
  5. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    My parents were primates, and my apologies to primates for this comparison, so I definitely get sorry you did not get the love and support you deserved...and I also definitely understanding wanting parenting...I did even though I knew they were malicious primates
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