the next step

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by wunderwood, Mar 28, 2009.

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  1. wunderwood

    wunderwood Well-Known Member

    I knew a few months ago that I wasn't going to make it. I obtained how I've wanted to go out and have had it for the past month.

    Tomorrow, I clean my apartment and get rid of a few things. I worry about doing the delayed email to the cops, because they can't just get into the foyer here. I'm wondering if it is better just to go to a hotel. I know I am going to hurt people, but I want it to be as easy as possible.

    I feel sad in the way that I don't feel sad anymore. Strange feeling. Like I want to go home, but I realize there is no home to go to.
  2. jameslyons

    jameslyons Well-Known Member


    How about you clean your apartment then go see a movie? You DON"T have to do this, please reconsider. Try taking an ice bath, they help.
  3. thorns_all_over

    thorns_all_over Green Thumb Staff Alumni

    Call me crazy, but I sense that you don't really want to die. That there's
    still hope left in you! And as long as there's hope, there's still a way
    to change things for the better.

    You have come this far in life, so why should you give up now?
    Life is a struggle for most people and there are many battles you loose,
    and others that you win. It only matters that you keep on fighting,
    so that in the end you will win the war!

    I just wish I could help more than just with words...

    Oh wait, I can... :hug:
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    You have been with the forum long enough to know that many of us are suicidal.. We live day to day with the hope that the next one will be better..Getting the support here from your friends and even from the other members helps to keep that hope shining thru the darkest days..Stay with us and maybe consider joining a group therapy where you have visual contact with people..At least see a good therapist, but you have to be honest with them about your feelings and give it time.. They have to get to know you first and then they can put together a treatment plan..Like I said it takes time but in the long run it does help..Stay with us!!!
  5. justafool

    justafool Well-Known Member

    Have you ever called a suicide hot line? They may or may not change your mind, but it's something that you should put on your "to-do" list. See what happens.
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hello wunderwood,

    I really hope you reconsider,you don't have to do this.
    Please keep talking to us. We will help you through this.
    Also,I agree with the above suggestions ,try calling a suicide hotline,or even go to a drop in centre, there's the samaritans if you are in the UK or Ireland,I don't know about elsewhere. Don't give up,keep fighting xx
  7. wunderwood

    wunderwood Well-Known Member

    thanks for your replies. I am holding on for a bit, a few loose ends to tie up.

    I'm not posting for attention or any crap like that, I just don't want to feel alone when i die. And since this subject is so taboo I wanted to at least have people know.

    I wish you all well.
  8. Lovecraft

    Lovecraft Well-Known Member

    I just want to say that if your method is an OD on some drug, they have degraded a great deal in the months since you got them unless you've kept the pills in a mild climate without sunlight or moisture.
  9. wunderwood

    wunderwood Well-Known Member

    they haven't, but thank you for the thoughts.
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